


Imbalance

by TerraBrownWriter, xNinjaGurl50



Series: The FamILY RP (full of angst and ships) [4]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Emotional/Psychological Abuse, M/M, Physical Abuse, Read the first 3 fics in the series first!, Roleplay, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, There will be Warnings, Violence, You can skip those chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-04 04:36:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 13
Words: 25,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16339946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TerraBrownWriter/pseuds/TerraBrownWriter, https://archiveofourown.org/users/xNinjaGurl50/pseuds/xNinjaGurl50
Summary: And the story continues! Patton is emotionally imbalenced, Nico is trying to find his place and identity, Nemo is apathetic, Logan is trying to take care of them all, Roman is running around somewhere... he just here for the ride.





	1. I'm Alive

"So... Let me get this straight." Virgil says.

 

"Good luck with that..." Nico mumbles. 

 

Virgil stares at him a moment, then looks at Roman, then back at Nico, then back at Roman. "You two are perfect for each other." He says with a smirk. "So... You were killed?"

 

"Yes." Nico responds.

 

"And what happened after that?" Virgil asks.

 

"I woke up in what I think was the subscape. I didn't remember anything, what happened, who I was, nothing. I walked through the imagination to Roman's castle, following a 'feeling'. I went to the garden where I saw the sunflowers. I touched the gravestone and suddenly remembered everything." Nico says.

 

Virgil looks to Logan sitting on the couch to his left. Patton is on his right, Nico sandwiched between Patton and Roman. Patton is crying tears of joy. "I'm just so happy that you are alright." He hugs Nico as Roman gives him a jealous glare.

 

Logan leans back and thinks "You are insecurity. Since you've been gone I would admit we haven't been feeling the best. Thomas hasn't been feeling good at all. It could be that a high level of insecurity brought you back, so you can help manage it. Just how Virgil manages anxiety."

 

Nico pats Patton's head and gives Roman a shy 'sorry' smile. He looks at the ground, thinking over what Logan said. "But what's the difference between insecurity and anxiety?" He asks.

 

"Anxiety usually worries over things, insecurities are those things. Insecurity is usually internal issues, while anxiety is over external ones." Virgil says. Nico nods and goes silent again.

 

"I wouldn't be surprise if you start working with Virgil more. I might work with you too, to help rationalize illogical thoughts and concerns."

 

Nico nods then sighs. "I didn't think of how much work it was going to be to be a side... I mean, I don't mind doing my part... I'm just... Still so confused. I don't know if we'll ever find the answer..." He thinks for a minute then laughs. "Welp, I found my first insecurity..."

 

"What?" Virgil asks.

 

"My origin." Nico says, looking up at him. "Who am I? What am I?"

 

"You are Nico 'Insecurity' Sanders. You are a side of Thomas personality. Things have move pretty fast for you, but I believe you can adjust." Logan looks at Roman. "and I'm sure there is someone who would help you ever step of the way."

 

Roman holds onto Nico hand and squeezes it. "Of course," He rest his head on his shoulder.

 

Nico smiles and leans into Roman. He wants to protest. He wants to explain that it's not the same. That they all know where they came from, but he doesn't. He doesn't know where he belongs.

 

He moves to wrap his arms around Roman, not really caring what the others thought anymore. He needed to feel safe. He thinks for a moment and realizes that  _this_ is where he belongs. In his love's arms. He sighs and closes his eyes, relaxing in Roman's hold.

 

 _'So clingy.'_  he hears. He groans and grimaces. "Not you again..." he whispers.

 

"Hmm what was that?" Roman asked "I didn't hear you?"

 

Patton lets go of Nico so Roman can hold him. He wipes away his tears.

 

"Nothing." Nico mumbles.

 

Virgil frowns. "Nico..." he says slowly.

 

"What?" Nico says, opening one eye to look at Virgil.

 

"What's up?" 

 

"East."

 

Virgil snorts and covers his mouth laughing. Nico grins. Question avoided. Good. He really didn't feel like trying to explain it all. He wasn't even sure if he could.

 

"So, are we going to talk about the" Logan pulls out his note cards "elephant in the room?"

 

Virgil bursts out laughing. It takes him a moment to recover. "Ya?" he says, trying to wipe the smile off his face.

 

Nico laughs a little bit, but stops, heart beating faster. He knows what Logan is talking about.

 

"What are we going to do about Nemo? He hasn't left his room and I don't think he will be too pleased about Nico."

 

Roman holds him protectively. "He going to have to get over it." Roman was still piss that he killed Nico in the first place.

 

Nico curls into Roman. "Roman, please-"

 

"No, I'm piss he shouldn’t have killed you!" Roman yelled.

 

Patton shivered, he looks back on it. He couldn't believe it at first now all he can see are his soulless red eyes as he pushes him away.

 

Nico curls up tighter, heart racing faster and faster, hands beginning to shake. "Roman..." he whispers. "It wasn't him."

 

"What do you mean? I saw him, we all did."

 

"Roman stop. You’re not helping." Logan says watching Nico curl up tighter.

 

Nico shakes his head. "The red eyes... the hollow look..." He looks up at Roman, golden eyes pleading for the prince to understand. "I don't think his dark side is gone. I don't think it's me." He says.

 

Everyone goes silent. Patton goes white he covers his mouth. _'he's in danger, he says he would be stuck for days like that. He needs me'_ Patton jumps from the couch and starts running up the stairs.

 

"PATTON" Logan called out.

 

Virgil shoots up, but Nico is faster, tackling Patton down and maneuvering them so Nico takes the brunt of the fall. "Oomf! Patton!" Nico says, grabbing the other's wrists. "You can't help him!" He looks into the other's eyes caringly. "You can't help him." He says again, calmer this time. "He has to go through it. It's been two days... Give him some time and he'll get out of it."

 

"but...but I can help him. I can...I can..." Tears fall from his face.

 

Logan makes his way to them. "Patton you can't, you know what that will do to you. If you keep throwing yourself out of balance you will fall into a coma. I can't let that happen again."

 

Nico nods and stands up, letting Logan take Patton and stepping back. Patton is swayed too easily by the dark emotions... But Nico... Nico makes his way up the stairs, Virgil following. Nico shakes his head and gestures for Virgil to stay. "Keep Roman here." He says and Virgil nods. 

 

Nico walks down the hall. He places a hand on Nemo's door. He feels the strong storm of insecurities raging inside the room, vaguely wondering how on earth the others can't sense it. He just stands there a moment, knowing of the problem but no knowing how to fix it.

 

Patton cries into Logan shoulder. Roman stands up. "I'm not letting him go up there by himself!" Virgil stands in his way. "Virgil please, he needs me."

 

Virgil shakes his head. "Roman, give Nico a chance. You're upset- for good reason, but it's not going to help anything if you march in there, sword drawn. Let Nico work." He says, determined and unwavering.

 

He sighs and sits back down. "I don't want to lose him again." Logan bring Patton to the couch and sets him down. 

 

"Watch them" Logan makes his way up stairs.

 

Nico rests his head against the door, hearing all Nemo's insecurities.

 

_I killed him. I killed him. I killed him. I did it. I killed someone. I hurt Patton. I love him. I hurt him. I hurt Roman. I killed his love. I hurt them. I hurt them all. They're all going to die. It's my fault. I was never Nico. It was always me. I am a monster. I am the monster. I'm going to kill them all. I can't stop. I can't- I can't! Die. Die. Die. Have to die. Can't hurt them anymore._

 

Nico's hands glow yellow as the door unlocks and opens.

 

Nemo looks up in surprise, then freezes like he's seen a ghost. He has. That has to be- It can't be- he's dead...!? But... he looks... different. He doesn't have scales anymore. He's wearing a gray cloak instead of a red one. His hands and neck are black. His golden eyes... the ones that stared at him in fear in his final moments... They look at him now with... pity???

 

Nico moves further in and closes the door. He looks back at Nemo.

 

"N-Nico?" Nemo asks quietly, voice sore from crying and not talking for the past two days.

 

Nico nods. "I forgive you." He says before anything else. 

 

Nemo sits there, stunned, before he breaks down sobbing again. He falls face first onto his bed. Nico moves over carefully, sitting down and slowly stroking Nemo's hair. Nemo whimpers and cries loudly, barely audible 'I’m sorry's leaving his lips. Nico shushes him and rubs his back. 

 

"It's okay. I forgive you." Nico says. Nemo continues to cry for a long time...

 

Logan waits on the outside door in case that things went wrong. When he feels that things have calm he knocks on the door. "It's Logan, am I allowed to enter?"

 

Nico looks up at the door then down at Nemo. Nemo nods currently buried beneath blankets and partially in Nico's lap. "Go ahead." Nico calls.

 

Logan enters and closes the door. He sits on the edge of the bed. Not sure what to say. He pets Nemo hair.

 

Nemo purrs and leans into it, sobs having turned to soft gasps. " 'm s'rry..." he whispers over and over. Nico sits there and watches them.

 

"I know. You weren't in control. It seems we haven't fixed the original problem. I am sorry"

 

Nemo shakes his head. "Not your fault." He lays his head down, wrapping the blanket around his hand and in between his fingers. He looks at Nico. "How are you alive?" He asks in awe.

 

Nico looks down. "I don't know." he answers.

 

"I theorized that a high level of insecurity brought him back. He’s now needs to manage Thomas insecurities."

 

Nemo nods, closing his eyes. "I don't want to stay here..." He whispers. "But I don't feel strong enough to face the others."

 

"We can go to my room. It's calmer and you don't have to face the others right now. I can tell you that they’re not mad at you. Nico explain what happened."

 

Nemo nods. "Okay." He says, not making any attempt to move.

 

Nico gets up to leave and head back downstairs. He turns back at the door. He looks at Nemo for a moment before picking up one of the nearby snakes and bringing it to him, placing it around his neck. 

 

Nemo smiles and strokes the snake, the noodle happily bleeping him back.

 

Logan smiles then picks Nemo up sinking him into his room. He lays him down in his bed and tucks him in. "Do you want anything?"

 

Nemo shakes his head then stops to think for a moment. "Tell Patton I love him." He asks.

 

Logan smiles "Of course, do you want to see Patton?"

 

Nemo hesitates then nods his head. "I do, but... I'm scared."

 

"I can give you 15 minutes before sending him. If you think that might help."

 

Nemo thinks it over, then nods. "I'm hungry too..." He says sheepishly, holding his snake close.

 

Logan nods "I'll have Patton make...I'll bring something for you." He then sinks out before Nemo can question him. He shows up in the commons.


	2. Forgiveness

Virgil looks up from talking with Patton. Nico looks over from where Roman is checking him over for injuries. He swats at Roman's hands. "Roman! I told you! I'm fine!" he says exasperated.

 

Logan looks over at Patton. "Nemo wants to see you" Patton face lights up. "Patton please stay calm. He is tired." Patton nods. "He is also hungry"

 

"Oh, I made him his favorite pie!" Patton runs to pick it up.

 

"Patton your hands!" Logan calls out. Patton stops before he can pick it up.

 

"Opps, I forgot" Patton childish smiles. Logan walks over and picks it up for him.

 

_Fear. Fear. Fear._

 

Nico shakes his head. "Shut up..." he mumbles.

 

Virgil gets up and grabs some plates for the pie.

 

"Thank you, Virgil." Logan cuts into the pie and puts a slice on it. "I told him we will wait 15 minutes then you can see him ok." Patton nods.

 

Roman looks at Nico. "What?"

 

"Hmm?" Nico says, looking up to Roman's eyes. "Oh, nothing..." He leans up and kisses him softly.

 

He frowns at him "Nico your worrying me. What's wrong?"

 

Nico bites his lip and shakes his head. "I need to go..." he says, trying to pull away from Roman.

 

"Nico..." Roman lets him go.

 

Nico takes one step before falling to the ground, curling up and crying. 

 

Virgil comes out of the kitchen. "What happened?"

 

"I don’t- know!" Nico says between gasps.

 

 _FEAR! FEAR! FEAR!_  The chant gets louder in his head.

 

Roman goes down to him. "Nico, what's wrong? Talk to me."

 

Logan and Patton come out. Patton takes a step forward and Logan grabs his arm. "Don't"

 

Nico clutches Roman's shirt. "S-Scared!" He weakly pulls himself closer to Roman. "W-Why, am I scared?"

 

Patton tries to move to him again and Logan pulls him back. "Don't, it won't solve anything."

 

Roman pulls him close and holds him. "Virgil you got an idea?"

 

Virgil kneels down and pets Nico's hair. "He's under a lot of stress right now. He needs to rest and sleep." He says softly, brushing away Nico's tears. He gently lifts up Nico's chin. "You can't pretend to be okay forever. You have to tell us when you're not, so we can help you, okay?" He says offering a smile. "I know it's scary to ask for help, but you'll feel better, I promise."

 

Nico nods slowly.

 

Roman nods he picks him up and sinks to his room. He gets into his bed still holding him. "Shh everything it going to be ok."

 

Nico’s breath shudders as he buries his face into Roman’s chest. “‘M sorry. Please... don’t leave me...”

 

 _You’re a terrible person. You should have stayed in the subscape and died. All you do is bring pain to Roman and the people he loves._  Nico’s sobs gain vigor.

 

Roman pets his hair "Shh I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying right here sunshine. Your prince isn't going anywhere."

 

Nico smiles through his tears. The thoughts continue to rain down on him as he cries himself to sleep.

 

Roman sighs and holds him close.

 

...

 

Logan pull Patton back into the kitchen. "You can't keep trying to switch emotions. I know you want to help but that is not the way. You keep doing that and you. Will. Fall into a coma. Stop it. I can’t cover for you again." Patton lowers his head.

 

"I'll stop" Logan sighs and looks at his watch.

 

"Close enough. Alright let’s go see Nemo." Logan picks up the slice of pie.

 

Virgil sits on the couch, scrolling through his phone and making a playlist of music for Nico. He glances up as Logan and Patton walk past. “Should I come with or no?” He asks.

 

"I think Patton should be fine for now. I don't want to overwhelm him. I'm just helping with the pie then I'll be back down." Patton and Logan walk upstairs and to Logan room. Logan knocks on the door. "Nemo it's Logan and Patton can we come in?" Patton hides his hands behind his back.

 

“Ya.” Nemo calls and sits up. He flicks his tongue. Something smells good!

 

Logan opens the door and they walk in. Patton continues to hide his hands as Logan brings the pie to him. "Patton made your favorite pie." Patton stands a little back looking a little nervous.

 

Nemo looks hungrily at the pie then up at Patton. He remembers what happened the last time they saw each other... “Thank you, Patton. It smells delicious.” He says softly, taking the pie.

 

Logan walks back to Patton. "Breath" Patton takes a deep breath and nods. Logan closes the door on his way out. Patton looks back at Nemo. 

 

"Ok first I need to show you something, please don't freak out."

 

Nemo’s eyes widen. “O-Okay?”

 

Patton shows him his bandage hands. "I had a baking accident and burn my hands." _'I wasn't feeling and burn my hands on purpose.'_

 

Nemo looks up at Patton and slowly slides off the bed and walks towards him. He gently picks up Patton’s wrists, looking at his hands a moment. He looks up into Patton’s eyes. “Why?” He whispers.

 

Patton shakes his head. "I haven't been stable. I shut down. I didn't care. It's too much. I-" he gets choke up.

 

Nemo draws Patton into a hug. “Shh...” he says, rubbing his back. He nuzzles his hair. “Shh... it’s not your fault.” Oh, he hates this. He hates to see Patton in pain.

 

Patton lets out a cry. "Be honest with me, do you hate me? Do I make things worse?"

 

Nemo squeezes him tighter. “I don’t hate you.” He says. “But sometimes... you can be impulsive. You try to help, but you don’t think things through. And it hurts me to see you in pain.” He runs his hands through Patton’s hair and massages his neck.

 

 _'I DO MAKE THINGS WORSE!'_ Patton lets out a loud sob. "I'm sorry"

 

“Shh... not all the time. You help a lot too. Don’t you dare think that you mess everything up, because you don’t. I wouldn’t lie to you about that. You know that. You know I love you.” He says, not planning on letting him go anytime soon. ‘ _I will protect him.’_ Repeats over in his mind.

 

"You keep pushing me away. I don't want to lose you but I am. You don't need me, you don't want me." Patton just lets it all out. He needs to know if it's true. He hates that he is making Nemo upset. He wishes he could just be happy and pretend that everything is ok. He wishes he wasn't so stupid, maybe if he was more logical. He wouldn't mess up so much.

 

“Shh...” Nemo says, Patton’s words hurting his heart, though he knows they’re lies. Most of them anyways. “I’m sorry I keep pushing you away. I don’t mean to hurt you or make you feel like I don’t need you. Because I do. I really do. But I’m Just afraid of hurting you.”

 

Patton laughs "I'm afraid of hurting you too." Patton finally relaxes to Nemo touch, he tired. He needs to stop breaking down, it's exhausting. "Please don't push me away. It hurts more than anything you can do to me."

 

“I’ll try.” He says, cupping Patton’s face and kissing him deeply. “I love you so much.” He says, kissing him, longer this time.

 

Patton holds on to him. He kisses him back not wanting to let go. "Don't let go of me"

 

“I won’t.” Nemo promises. He moves them to the bed and lays them down, continuing to kiss Patton, holding him close, vowing to himself to never hurt him again.

 

"I love you" Patton slowly relaxes and go silent falling asleep in Nemo embrace.

Nemo strokes Patton’s hair, hunger forgotten as he falls asleep holding his love.

 

…

 

Logan holds Virgil as he relaxes reading a book.

 

Virgil sighs as he feels everyone’s anxiety levels decrease. “How’s your leg?” He suddenly asks, leaning down to prod it a bit.

 

"It's better, how's your nose?" He smirks

 

“It’s fine” Then he smirks and licks his lips with half lidded eyes before bopping Logan’s nose. “Boop.”

 

Logan chuckles "Someone is being silly today"

 

Virgil smiles and nuzzles Logan’s cheek. “I’m tired. It’s been a long day.”

 

He kisses his forehead. "Then sleep."

 

Virgil closes his eyes and hums. “Okay...” he says, finding a more comfortable position. “Love you, Lo.”

 

"Love you too Virgil." Logan closes his eyes and relaxes in the embrace of his boyfriend.

…

Nico stirs and moans. He hears Roman screaming. He spins around, trying to find his love. 

_”NICO!!!”_

 

“ROMAN!” Nico searches desperately. “ROMAN!” He’s falling. When did he start falling? Everything’s out if control. Suddenly, he’s holding Roman by his throat, hands covered in an awful liquid. Roman’s hazed and frozen eyes stare at him with a haunted look. “ROMAN!” Nico screams, dropping him. He’s love’s body falls into the void. Suddenly he’s falling again. He’s screaming. Kicking...

 

_"NICO"_

_"NICO"_

 

"NICO, WAKE UP!" Nico opens his eyes and sees Roman on top of him holding him down. Roman breaths heavy as he slowly gets off him. Pulling him into a hug.

 

Nico looks around with wide eyes, clutching Roman and shaking. “W-What? What happened?”

 

"You had a nightmare, it's ok it's over now, your safe now." He kisses his forehead.

 

Nico sighs and leans into it. He suddenly pulls away. “I can’t stay here.”

 

"What do you mean?" Roman asked in worry.

 

Nico shakes his head and cradles Roman’s face. “There’s something bigger at play here. Something controlling both Nemo and me. I have to find it. I can’t let it hurt you anymore.” He kisses Roman’s cheek.

 

"You don't have to do this alone. Don't shut us out." Roman plead holding onto his love.

 

Nico closes his eyes and leans his head against Roman. “I don’t know what’s best...”

 

"What do you mean something is controlling you?"

 

“I don’t know. Some... unknown force... Whenever Nemo or I am under its control, our eyes turn red... that has to mean something. And when I came back, I didn’t have scales anymore, like I wasn’t borrowing Nemo’s form, I have my own now...” he says, examining his black hands.

 

"We can talk to Logan see what he thinks, he’s smart." _'he's smarter than me, I'm no help.'_

 

Nico looks up at Roman. He pulls him close. “I wish we could live without ever leaving each other’s side...”

 

Roman kisses him on the lips. "I know"

 

Nico suddenly looks at Roman seriously. “I’m sorry that I sent that snake to bite you and Logan...”

 

"YOu-" Roman stops and takes a deep breath. "It's in the past, it's alright. Besides you said that when you are being control you have red eyes. You had red eyes then, you might have not been in control."

 

Nico bows his head and nods. “I’m still sorry, though...”

 

"It's alright, I forgive you. I'm sure Logan will too. Do you want to talk to him? Do you want to rest? What would make you happy?"

 

“I just want to forget...” he says sadly, looking into Roman’s eyes. “I just want to forget the rest of the world. I want you to hold me. I want to pretend we’re the only ones in existence...”

 

"Alright, we’ll stay here." He nuzzles up to Nico burying his face into his chest. "How's this?"

 

Nico hums. “Nice...” he runs his hands through Romans hair.


	3. Pie Party

Patton slowly wakes up. He sees Nemo curl in on him. Patton smiles at him and pets his hairand scratches his scales. His hands sting at being uses but he tries to ignore it.

 

Nemo moans and rubs his cheek against Patton's. He wraps his legs around Patton’s waist. “Mine...” he mumbles sleepily.

 

Patton giggles and cuddles with him "I love you” he whispers to the sleeping side.

 

“Love you too...” mumbles against him, not letting go. “You’re mine. I’m gonna go with you wherever you go. I’ll turn into a snake and be your scarf...” he says, still half asleep.

 

Patton giggles at the idea of Nemo being a snake scarf. Nemo moves a little and lands on Patton hand. He gives at a yelp before pulling his hand back and holding it. Patton tries to move but can't because of how Nemo is holding him.

 

Nemo wakes up and jumps away, looking at Patton. “What!?” He sees his hand. “Oh! Patton! I’m so sorry!” He moves to take Patton’s hand.

 

"It-s alright, it was an accident. Their just still sore, I'm alright." _'It hurts a lot why did I go burn myself?'_

 

“Shh... we should ask Logan to change your bandages...” he suggests, examining the exposed skin.

 

Patton nods as he gets up. "I'm sorry"

 

“For what, my precious?” Nemo asks softly, lifting Patton bridal style and walking to the door.

 

Patton curls in on him as he cradles his hand. "I woke you up."

 

Nemo shakes his head. “You’re more important than sleep.” He carries Patton down the hall, noticing Roman’s door is closed. His sensitive hearing picks up on Roman and Nico’s voices. He moves down the stairs and sees Logan with Virgil passed out on his lap.

 

"Lo?" Patton quietly said. Logan turn his head and looked at them.

 

"Is something the matter?"

 

“Patton needs his bandages changed.” Nemo says.

 

"Oh of course." Logan slowly gets up making sure not to wake Virgil. He moves to the kitchen and motions Nemo to follow. Logan pulls down the first aid kit. "Nice to see that you two made up." Patton hums as a response giving Logan his hands.

 

Nemo blushes. _‘And made out...’_ he thinks to himself. “Is there anything I can do?” He asks.

 

"Well if you put him down you can do his other hand." Logan smirks at him.

 

Nemo smiles sheepishly and sets Patton down. He moves and carefully unwraps the bandages, grimacing at the peeling skin. “Patton... what did you grab?” Nemo asks in shock.

 

Patton nervously laughs. "The pie pan..."

 

Nemo looks up at Patton then Logan. “The same pie you brought for me?” Their looks tell him all he needs to know. “Then we will eat it all! Your scars will not be in vain!” He says, imitating Roman’s grand hand movements.

 

Logan smiles at him. "That sounds like a plan" He finishes Patton hand.

 

Nemo smiles and kisses Patton’s neck, he finishes Patton hand then picks him up and carries him to the couch. He walks back in the kitchen, gets a slice for each of them, heats it up, and brings it out.

 

Patton giggles at him and holds up his hands. "I'm going to need some help."

 

Nemo smirks and takes a piece of pie on his fork and holds it up for Patton to eat. 

 

Virgil wakes up, smelling pie. He sees Nemo feeding Patton and looks to Logan. “How come we don’t do that? That’s adorable!” He mock pouts. 

 

Nemo laughs and gives Patton another bite.

 

Logan raises his eyebrow. "You want me to feed you like a baby?" He smirks "Alright, come here baby" He holds a piece of pie to his face.

 

Virgil smirks and opens his mouth, chomping on the pie. He licks his lips and lifts a piece for Logan. He takes a bite.

 

Nemo laughs. “It’s a pie party!” He says.

 

"We should see if Roman and Nico want to join us!" Patton said then takes another bite of pie.

 

Virgil nods and takes another bite before getting up.

 

He heads up the stairs and knocks on Roman's door. "Hey, we're having a pie party downstairs if you guys want!"

 

"Do you want to go get pie?" Roman asked muffled by his face being attached to Nico chest.

 

Nico purrs and thinks for a moment. "Sure." he says, shifting to get up.

 

"We'll be right out!" Roman shouts to Virgil. He then gets up and holds Nico hand. "Come sunshine there is pie to eat!"

 

Nico smiles and kisses Roman's cheek. "Lead the way, my prince."

 

Roman leads Nico downstairs in to the commons and sees everyone feeding each other pie. Roman sits on the couch next to Patton. "Nice to see you out of your room Nemo." Roman smirks at him as he picks up his plate if pie and stick a piece in front of Nico face.

 

Nemo stiffens slightly when Roman comes near them but relaxes with Roman's playful banter. "You too, sleeping beauty." Virgil hacks from somewhere in the kitchen.

 

Nico jumps back at the sudden movement of the fork being thrust in front of him, but slowly leans down and takes a bite. He tastes it for a moment before smiling. "Who made this?" he asks, picking up a piece for Roman.

 

Roman takes the bite from Nico. "I did, remember I burnt my hands." Patton said. "I'm glad you like it." Patton smiles at him.

 

Nico nods. This is nice. To be included and loved not only by Roman, but everyone else as well. If only he could get rid of that nagging voice...

 

Virgil comes back with a stupid smirk on his face. Nico raises an eyebrow at him and Virgil holds a finger to his lip, signaling to keep quiet. He sneaks up behind Logan and drops an ice cube down the back of his shirt.

 

Logan shoots up from the couch. "AHhh" he turns around as he squirms to get the ice cube out. "Virgil!? Why?"

 

Patton and Roman laugh at the scene as Logan face goes red from embarrassment. Virgil is on the ground rolling around and laughing. Nemo has his hand over his mouth, trying to hold back, and Nico just laughs loudly and unashamed. That's the first time he's laughed like that, a genuine laugh in the presence of friends- no, family.

 

Virgil, barely recovered, holds up his phone with a recording of the moment playing.

 

"Ooo... You better run, boy!" Nemo says with a chuckle.

 

Logan is about to jump the couch when Roman grabs him. "Unhand me Roman!" 

 

"Quick I'll get you a head start." Roman says between laughs as he tries to keep Logan in his grip.

 

Virgil takes off up the stairs and down the hall, laughing all the way.

 

Roman let's go of Logan and he makes his way up the stairs as he yells "VIRGIL ANXIETY SANDER YOU GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT AND DELETE THAT VIDEO!" 

 

Patton laughs "I hate to be Virgil right now. Logan is a threat to be reckoned with." Nemo chuckles and continues feeding Patton as shrieks and laughter echo from upstairs.

 

Nico can't stop smiling. "So... This is the usual for you guys?"

 

"Pretty much though April fool's is a lot worst. Remember that time when Virgil switch your shampoo with hair dye?" 

 

Roman groans "Yes, I had black hair for a week!" Patton giggled finishing the rest of the pie. 

 

Nico smirks and looks up at Roman, imagining what he must have looked like with black hair. He must have been handsome...

 

"Thanks for feeding me sweetie."

 

Nemo smiles and leans up to kiss Patton's forehead. "Of course, honeydew." he says with a wink.

 

Virgil comes flying down the stairs and practically yeets himself behind the couch. "Save meh!" he screeches.

 

"YOU CAN'T ESCAPE ME" Logan leaps the couch landing on Virgil pending him down. "Now time for revenge." Logan smirks at him as he starts tickling his stomach.

 

Virgil screeches and starts squirming and laughing. "Lo-LOGAN! SHTAP! I CAN’T- HAHAHA! SSSTTTOP!" He laughs so hard his eyes start watering and he can't breathe. He desperately swats at Logan's hands, trying to win a moment to collect himself.

 

"Like I said, treat to be reckoned with." 

 

Logan stops and kisses Virgil on the lips. Virgil moans into the kiss, Logan sits straight still on top of Virgil. "Did we learn our lesson?" He smirks at him.

 

Virgil nods his head. "No more ice cubes down the shirt." he says with a smile, still trying to get his breath back.

 

"Good" Logan stands up and adjust his tie and sits on the couch like it never happened. 

 

Patton relaxes, he misses this. Things are looking up. Everyone is pair they have a new family member. Patton happy. Patton leans onto Nemo wishing he could hold his hand.

 

Nemo wraps his arm around Patton and side hugging him.

 

Virgil gets up and walks over with a dangerous look in his eyes. "Next time... It'll be your pants." And he  _runs_.

 

"Virgil nO!" Nemo says with a laugh. Nico nearly chokes on his bite of pie.

 

Logan stays on the couch unfazed. Roman looks at him. "You aren't going to chase him." Logan smiles at him evilly.

 

"Oh no, I rather read this book I picked up from Virgil room." Logan pulls out a black notebook. "I think it's a biography of some sort. Should I read it aloud?"

 

Nemo raises a brow. "What  _kind_  of biography?" he asks, smirking. 

 

Nico frowns and stands up, quickly snatching the notebook from Logan and holding it protectively to his chest. "This is his diary. By reading it out loud you betray the trust he has placed in you." he knows he probably just ruined the mood, but he doesn't care. He wouldn't want anyone going through his things, even Roman, and he sure wasn't going to let the others do that to one another either. Somethings were better left unknown.

 

Logan smiles at him. "I am aware. That's why it's empty. I was hoping to scare Virgil, but it doesn't look like he heard me. Oh well, thank you for caring about our privacy though Nico. I'll be sure to respect yours." Logan stands as he starts picking up plates. “I will start cleaning up now." 

 

"I'll help" Patton try before Logan glares at him.

 

"Patton your hands. It's alright I can handle a few plates."

 

"Oh." Nico says, looking down at the notebook and flipping it open to find it empty. He closes it and still holds it close to him, as if it's his now. He doesn't know what to do with it. He doesn't even know where it came from. He feels like a moron for taking a prank seriously.

 

He quietly makes his way up the stairs as Nemo helps Logan clean up. Virgil suddenly pops out from around the corner and puts his hand over Nico's mouth before he can scream. 

 

"Shh!" Virgil says, dropping his hand. "Look, I just wanted to say, I heard what happened. And that was really brave of you and I appreciate that." he says with a genuine smile.

 

Nico stares at him for a moment processing what just happened. "Oh." he says again awkwardly. Awkward. Why was he so awkward? "Here." he says, offering the book. 

 

Virgil shakes his head. "Keep it." he says with a smile. "I think you could use it." He summons a purple pen and opens the book to the front page and writes something in it. He closes it and hands it back to Nico, pen disappearing, and heads back downstairs, leaving Nico standing in the hall.

 

Nico opens it and reads, _'Never let what others think of you stop you from standing for what is right. -V'_ Nico carefully traces the writing with his black fingers. He closes the book and heads to his room. He closes the door and flops onto his bed, opening the book again and retracing the writing. What was this feeling? It was... Warm. And inviting. He feels like crying, but he isn’t sad. In fact, ... He's happy! Boy he has a lot of learning about himself to do...


	4. I’m a Goner

Logan is washing the dishes. Roman walks in. "Hey, Lo can we talk?"

 

Logan keeps his eyes on the plate. "Of course, Roman what is the matter?"

 

"Nico has told me that there is this unknown force controlling him and Nemo." Logan stop cleaning the plate and looks at Roman. "He hasn't told me much, but he’s scared."

 

"Both of them..." Logan mumbles as he puts the plate down. He looks back at Roman. "What do you know?"

 

"He says when they are under the control they have red eyes."

 

Logan nods. "There a visible sign. Anything else?" Roman shakes his head. "I'll have to talk to them about it. See what I can figure out from there experience. Nico had red eyes for a long time..." Thank you Roman, I'll look into it."

 

"Thanks Logan"

 

Virgil flops onto the couch beside where Patton and Nemo are cuddling, Nemo purring and rubbing his face on Patton's shoulders. "Paaaaaaaaaat!" Nemo whines. Virgil smirks at them.

 

"Yes sweetie?" Patton giggles.

 

Nemo keeps purring and rubbing the scaled side of his face. Virgil frowns and leans over. He sighs. "Nemo... When was the last time you had a bath?"

 

Nemo stops and thinks. "A few days ago, ..." he says sheepishly.

 

Virgil groans. "What did I tell you about staying hydrated while you're shedding?"

 

Nemo buries his face into Patton, blushing.

 

"Aww does someone need a bath?" Patton giggles as he pets his hair slowly.

 

Nemo grumbles under his breath and Virgil laughs. "And scratches." Virgil says. "He's gonna be extra clingy for a week or so."

 

Patton looks at his hands hating himself more for stupidity burning them. "I'll try my best!" He says cheerily as he nuzzles his face into Nemo hair.

 

Nemo hums. "Where's Nico?" He asks. 

 

"I'm not sure, the last I saw he was down the hall..." Virgil thinks. _'Odd... He should have been down by now...'_

 

"Maybe he just with Roman. He been stuck to him like glue all day." Patton wondered _'but wasn't Roman in the kitchen?'_  "You think we should check on him?"

 

Virgil nods and stands up. Nemo stands and helps Patton up by his arms, being careful to avoid his hands.

 

Virgil heads to the kitchen. "Hey, Lo? Roman? Patton, Nemo, and I are gonna go look for Nico. He hasn't come back yet and we just wanna make sure he's okay."

 

"I'll come with you." Roman says as he walks towards Virgil. Logan turns back to the sink.

 

"I'll stay here and finish cleaning up."

 

Virgil leads the way up the stairs and heads to Nico's room, knocking on the door. "Nico? You okay?" he calls.

 

No response. 

 

Virgil knocks again. Nothing. He tries quietly opening the door. _'Maybe he's asleep...'_ he thinks. But it's locked. He looks back at the others.

 

Nemo's eyes are narrowed in thought, searching the door and the carpet for any signs.

 

Roman starts to get really worry. "Sunshine are you in there? Please say something."

 

Still no noise comes from his room. Virgil feels Roman's worry and lays a hand on his shoulder. Nemo steps forward, placing a hand on the door knob. It clicks, and he slowly pushes it open. He looks inside. There's no one there. He steps back next to Patton and lets the others in first.

 

Roman rushes in and looks around for any clue to where Nico could be.

 

Virgil steps in and glances at the bed. The notebook he gave him earlier is laying there, open on the first page. He picks it up and traces his own writing before scanning over the scribbles further down. He realizes they form a flower. A sunflower. A beautiful sunflower. There's a note on the side. 

 

"To Roman, my love, my prince." Virgil starts reading aloud, gaining everyone's attention. "The words I could never tell you for fear of repercussions, even now as I write this I'm afraid of what will happen when you read it. I plead you do not come after me. Where I am going, you cannot follow. I have to find the source. I can't let this go on. And I am the only one who is capable of finding it. I lov-" Virgil squints at the messy, smudged writing. "Run?" 

 

The room suddenly turns cold. Nemo starts shivering, being half snake and more susceptible to lack of heat. He holds Patton close. Dread fills Virgil as he spins around, the shadows looking as if they're moving.

 

"What happening?" Patton asked worryingly.

 

Roman adrenaline kicks in. "EVERYONE OUT" Roman grabs onto Virgil and starts pushing him towards the door hoping Nemo and Patton are doing the same thing.

 

Nemo's eyes widen, dragging Patton out with him. He pushes Patton out the door then stops, looking absently at the ground. 

 

"Nemo! Come on!" Virgil says, yanking Nemo out of the room. Nemo falls to the ground, slowly blinking.

 

Patton knees to him. "Nemo are you ok?"

 

Nemo nods, slowly sitting up, eyes regaining color after turning gray. Virgil runs back in and grabs Roman. "Let's go!" He says, pulling him towards the door.

 

Roman tried to move but his legs won't let him. "I can't, I'm stuck."

 

Virgil tries to pick him up. He looks around them, seeing the shadows closing in, Nico's room turning from gray to black. Virgil desperately pulls at Roman, but he continues to be dragged further into the room. "SAHLO FOLINA!" Virgil screams. He's not sure why that's what he decided to scream, but the shadows retreat for a moment, giving them a chance to escape. Virgil takes it, grabbing Roman and hoisting him up, making a break for the door.

 

Roman slaps the door close on his way out. "WHAT WAS THAT!?" He yells. Logan comes running up the hall. 

 

"What's going on is everyone ok?" He asks looking at all of them.

 

Virgil walks over and shakily hands him the notebook, pointing to the note next to the drawing.

 

Logan takes it from him and reads it. He then closes it and pulls him into a hug. "It's ok were going to figure this out." 

 

Roman backs up to the wall and slides down. He covers his face. "Nico...why?"

 

Nemo walks over, placing a hand on Roman's shoulder. He wants to tell him everything's going to be alright, that Nico will be fine, but he doesn't know that for sure and right now he's scared of lying, so he just stands there, massaging Roman's shoulders and trying to comfort him. He suddenly gets an idea. He walks over and takes the notebook from Logan, reading it over again. "The source..." He mumbles. "And I'm the only one capable of finding it... Somewhere you can't go..." There's something there... Something. He looks at Roman. "The source of what?"

 

"He said that there something trying to control him, him and you. He wanted to look for it, but I hold him back telling him not to go alone. I shouldn't have left his side." Roman buries his face into his hands. "I don't know where he went. Or what is causing all of this trouble."

 

"Shh..." Nemo says, kneeling down, not sure how to feel about knowing that the thing that made him kill Nico was still around. "You didn't leave him. We'll find him." He looks down at the notebook and the smudged writing at the end. "I think he tried... to honor his promise." he runs his thumb over the ink. "Something pulled him away..." He examines the drawing. "He's really good." Nemo says in awe, showing Roman it.

 

He smiles at the drawing. Then he looks at Nemo "You think it was the shadow? I swear they were dragging me." 

 

"Shadow?" Logan speaks up. "What shadows?"

 

"There were shadows... In the room." Virgil says. "They grabbed Roman and almost took him away. I don't know why, but I shouted 'Sahlo Folina' and they let go."

 

Nemo looks up. He thinks for a moment. "Sahlo Folina... Enable creative expression... opposite of which is-" He suddenly looks at Roman. "He was right... You can't follow him." He says sadly.

 

"Why not?" Roman asked. He wants to help his love.

 

"You are creativity and pride. He is insecurity. Roman... Nico is your counter, like I am Patton's. If I'm right, where I think he's going will suffocate and kill you..." Nemo says softly. "You, Logan, and Patton can't go there." He says, looking around. "But... Virgil and I can..." He looks up at Virgil.

 

Virgil's eyes narrow in thought. "But... If we go where I think you mean... what happens here? If Deceit and Anxiety aren't here to keep Thomas in check..." Virgil shakes his head. “Either way, I'm not going back there. Sorry."

 

"I don't like the idea of you going by yourself. Where are you going anyway?" Patton asked wrapping his arms around Nemo.

 

Nemo returns the hug. “The dark side.” He says after some hesitation. 

 

Virgil visibly shivers. “Yup. Nope. Not going back. Thank you very much.”

 

Logan holds Virgil protectively. "You don't have to, but I'm with Patton. Do you believe it's wise to go there? This affects you too and I don't know if it's worth the risk."

 

"So, we just let Nico do this by himself?" Roman angrily shot back.

 

"Roman please be reasonable, we're dealing with something we don't understand." Logan plead.

 

Nemo holds up the drawing. “Nico is clever. This is a map of the dark side of the mindscape. He disguised it as a flower so only someone from the dark sides would recognize it. He left us this clue. He’s asking for backup. I can’t just leave him on his own. Not after- “he cuts himself off. “I have to help him.” He says. “But I have to keep you all safe too.”

 

Patton holds him tight. "Don't go" he plead.

 

Nemo kisses his forehead. “I’ll be alright.” He says. “I’ll come back with Nico. I promise.”

 

Virgil walks up and snatches the journal from Nemo. 

 

“Hey!” Nemo exclaims, only to be shut up by Virgil’s glare.

 

“You. Are. Not. Going. Alone. Is that clear?”

 

Nemo slowly nods. 

 

“Good. There has to be another way, and we will find it.” Virgil says, looking at Roman.

 

"I don't like this one bit, who know how long he been in there. What if he hurt? What if-" 

 

"Roman." Logan stop him. "We will find another way. We'll get him back. For the meantime no one is allowed in Nico room. Is that clear?" Nemo and Virgil nod.

 

"I don't feel like getting drag to the dark side any time soon." Roman said. Logan looked at Patton who is looking at the picture.

 

"Patton is that clear?" Patton looks at him and nods. "Good, let's take this to the commons. I'll feel better if we were away from his room."

 

Nemo narrows his eyes at Patton and grabs his wrist before he can follow the others. “No matter what happens, you are not to go to the dark side. Okay?” He whispers.

 

Patton nods. "I'm just worry is all."

 

“I know. But Logan and Virgil are right. We’ll figure something out...” Nemo says, walking by Patton’s side down to the commons.

 

"Alright we need a plan of action." Logan sees Nemo and Patton come down the stairs. "Nemo, I hate to ask this, but I could really use any information you have on this unknown force."

 

Nemo shakes his head. “Everything I know about it was represented by Nico. But now that it’s not him... I don’t know where it could be...”

 

"Does it still talk to you?" Logan asked.

 

Nemo closes his eyes. “Yes.”

 

"What does it tell you?" Patton pulls him into a reinsuring hug.

 

“Everything I told you before.” Is all Nemo says, not looking up.

 

Logan nods "Well then you already know that nothing he told you is true then."

 

"I love you so much." Patton added giving him a squeeze.

 

“I love you too.” Nemo says, leaning into Patton.

 

“Do you think it talks to Nico?" Roman asked.

 

Nico nods at Roman’s question. “Probably. But why us though? Why just me and Nico?”

 

“Both your duties deal with lies. Maybe that’s why?” Virgil added.

 

“But what are we even fighting?” Nemo asks apathetically. “What’s the point?”

 

"Sadly, I don't know." Logan answer. "I don't have enough variable so make a hypothesis. It could be base off your roles or it could be that it was originally only you and Nico, who once was a part of you, got infected by it. I just don't know."

 

“But... A part of Nico is also from the subscape?” Virgil adds. 

 

Nemo groans and buries his head into Patton. Patton carefully rubs his back. "It's not your fault."

 

“I know, I’m just getting a headache.” Nemo says, muffle.

 

"You want some pain killers?" Patton asked nuzzling his hair with his face.

 

Nemo shakes his head. “I want to die.” His eyes widen as he slaps a hand over his mouth. He looks around wildly, breathing quickening. 

 

Virgil’s mouth drops, and he scoots closer. Patton holds him tight. "Don't say that. Tell me you don't mean that."

 

Nemo clutches onto Patton, beginning to cry. “I don’t- I don’t want to die. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what that was. I’m sorry!”Patton kisses his face and pets his hair ignoring the pain in his hands.

 

"You said that in the subscape... Nemo how are you feeling?" Logan asked.

 

“L-like I’m falling.” Nemo says. “I’m falling into a bottomless void pit and no one can save me. No one can stop my fall. I can only crash and then try to climb back out again.”

 

Patton feels a pit in his stomach. He wants to help, he wants to take his pain away, but he knows he can't. So, he just holds him tight and kisses him. "I won't let you fall." He tries to reinsure.

 

Nemo shakes his head. “Let me fall... I’ll only drag you down with me. Just promise me you’ll still be at the top when I make it back...”

 

Patton lifts his head and looks him in the eyes. "Ok I will, always." He then gives him a passion kiss.

 

Nemo closes his eyes and leans into it. He doesn’t want it to end, he’s scared of it ending, like it’s the last time he’ll get to kiss Patton like this. He forgets there’s other people around.

 

Roman leans towards Logan and whispers so he doesn't interrupt them. "So, what is our plan for Nico?" Logan sighs.

 

"I don't know. It might be best to wait and hope for the best."


	5. I’m Back

He’s being dragged backwards. He kicks and screams, but no sound leave his throat. He twists, but his body remains immobile. He can’t see anything. He reaches about to grip anything, but there’s nothing. Not even the ground. He’s alone. Alone. Alone. Alone. He cries. Stupid. Stupid. Weak. He grips himself, but it feels like he isn’t even real. ‘ _Someone save me...’_ he thinks. And then he’s asleep.

...

Roman paces the common impatiently. Logan looks at him from his book. “Roman please sit down your pacing is detracting.”

 

Roman turns and face Logan. “I’m worry ok! He’s been gone for an hour. How long am I supposed to wait? I can’t even do anything, the only person willing to go into the dark side is asleep in Patton lap.” Roman angrily points at Nemo.

 

“Shh you’re going to wake him.” Patton glare back as he pets his hair. Wincing at ever touch. Logan turns to Patton.

 

“Stop using your hands Patton.”

 

“It’s fine Lo.” Logan wasn’t convinced. He walked over to Patton and grab his wrists and looked him in the eye.

 

“Stop” He let go and Patton cross his arms and puff at him. Logan goes back to his chair and picked up his book.

 

Virgil is listening to music with one headphone off. “Did you guys have any favorite songs together?” He asks, scribbling and sketching in a notebook

 

"Me and Mo have very different taste in music, so we don't listen together." Patton answered.

 

"I don't even know what type of music Nico likes. What kind of boyfriend am I?" Roman said still pacing.

 

Virgil sighs. “Roman. You’ve been his boyfriend for a grand total of three days. Sit. The. F. Down.” He says, putting his notebook down.

 

Roman sits down. "Like you wouldn't be acting the same way if something happened to Logan" he mumbles.

Virgil’s fists clench and he glares at Roman out of the corner of his eye. He throws the notebook and pencil at him. “Draw.” He commands, getting up and heading to the kitchen. 

...

 

 _‘Someone... help... me..._ ’ he hears. He looks around him. Gray. Foggy. Void. Empty. Hollow. Feelings? What are those? 

 

He walks around. “Help...” he follows the voice. “Help...” the voice calls, growing weaker and further away. He starts running. There’s a golden flash and then darkness. Erie red glows around him.

 

A figure approaches through the fog. He squints his eyes. 

 

The figure looks up at him, revealing glowing red eyes and an evil grin. 

 

He screams and runs. Run. Run. Run. Must run. Faster. Faster. FASTER! ESCAPE! 

 

The figure is suddenly in front of him. 

 

‘You can’t escape me.’ He thinks. 

 

“Help!” The voice cries in the distance. 

 

He’s struck down, laying in a helpless heap. Shadow. Darkness. Cold. Hollow.

 

...

 

Roman picks up the notebook and pencil that was so rudely thrown at him and just sketch whatever. He didn't know what he just let his hand move.

 

Virgil leans back and closes his eyes, seeing if he can track Nico’s anxiety. As soon as he traces it to the dark side, he loses the trail. He sighs. His heart suddenly clenches. Fear. Panic. He can’t breathe. “H-help.” He chokes, paralyzed, eyes wide, hands shaking.

 

Logan looks up and moves to the kitchen. "Virgil? Virgil!" He puts his hands on his shoulders trying to ground him. "breath with me"

 

“C-can’t- “his breath catches in his throat. He’s gasping, convulsing, staring at Logan with frightened eyes.

 

Logan holds him. "It ok, you'll get through this." He rubs circles into his back.

 

Nemo moans and stirs uncomfortably. _‘The voice... it’s getting closer!’_

Patton looks at Nemo. "Nemo?"

 

There’s a thud in the dinner room. Oxygen finally fills Virgil’s lungs. He gasps and leans on Logan. Logan holds him up. “I got you”

 

Nemo shoots up, gasping and falls off the couch and Patton’s lap. 

 

"Nemo are you alright" Patton asks.

 

Nemo groans and sits up. “Ya.” He says. A groan travels through the dinner room as a gray cloaked figure lays on the floor.

 

Roman goes over to the dinner room and sees Nico. "NICO" he moves to his side and pulls him into his lap. "Are you alright my love?"

 

Nico moans, disorientated and out of it, not even hearing Roman. Roman pets his hair. "Nico can you hear me?" worry in his voice.

 

Nemo looks over at the new arrival. “NICO!” He shouts, attempting to run towards him and Roman, but tripping and falling again.

 

"Nemo be careful." Patton hover around him tries his hardest to not touch him with his hands.

 

“I’m okay.” Nemo says, getting up and walking over to Roman.

 

"Are you ok Virgil?" Logan asked.

 

Virgil breathes deeply and slowly stands on his own. “Y-ya.” He says, looking over to where Nico, Roman and Nemo are. 

 

Nico takes a breath and blinks a few times. “R-Roman?”

 

Roman nods his head. "It's me sunshine. Are you alright?" Roman said calmly not to startle his love. Patton stay back not wanting to crowd Nico and Roman.

 

“I- Roman!” Nico gasps as if seeing Roman for the first time. He gazes at him and runs his hand over the prince’s cheek. “Roman...” he says again.

 

Roman holds his hand to his face. "I'm right here, I'm here." He couldn't help the joyful tears that we're forming in his eyes. He was so worry, it's nice to finally see him again.

 

Nico breathes and leans up to cling to him. “Don’t leave me...” he whispers. His body trembles.

 

Roman holds and hugs him. "What happened?"

 

Nico shakes his head and grips Roman’s shirt tighter.

 

"Alright later then." Roman picks him up and carries him to the couch. Roman lays on the couch with Nico on top of him humming him a tune. He rubs circles into his back and tries to help him relax.

 

Nico breathes in Roman’s scent, still refusing to let go of him. Nemo’s eyes widen when he realizes the voice he heard in his dream was Nico’s.

 

"Virgil what happened? Why did you start panicking?" Logan asks.

 

"I... Don't know. I just was trying to follow the trail of Nico's anxiety and I couldn't, then I couldn't breathe, then he appeared and it all suddenly stopped." he says, thinking as he watches Roman and Nico.

 

Logan thinks for a moment then turns back to Virgil. "Come you should sit down." Logan starts dragging Virgil to the commons.

 

Virgil huffs and follows with a smirk.

 

"I'm so happy that he is ok." Patton said.

 

Nemo just stays quiet and nods, not wanting to tell Patton that Nico actually isn't alright.

 

Logan sits on the couch and puts Virgil in his lap holding him protectively and nuzzling his neck. Patton sits next to Logan and waves Nemo to join him.

 

Nemo looks at them all for a moment and smiles. "How about a movie?" he asks. 

 

Virgil looks up. Nico doesn't budge.

 

"A movie sounds amazing. Hmm what to watch." Roman wonders.

 

"How about Treasure Planet?" Patton suggested

 

"That's a wonderful choice Patton! What do you all think?" Roman asked. Logan nods his head. Virgil nods and smiles. 

 

"Okay! I'll set it up!" Nemo says.

 

"Never seen it." Nico mumbles, eyeing Roman curiously.

 

"Oh, you’re for a treat then, it's underrated. Honesty it deserves more love." Roman says couldn’t help fanboying about it.

 

"I'll make popcorn." Logan says as he moves Virgil and gets up making his way to the kitchen.

 

Nico smiles at Roman's enthusiasm and happiness.

 

Virgil scoots closer and cuddles with Patton. Nemo laughs when he sees them. "Logan, you've been replaced." he teases.

 

The sound of popcorn popping is heard in the background as Logan pops his head out of the kitchen. He sees Virgil and smirks at him. "He'll be back" then pops his head back in.

 

Patton giggles and hugs him. "How's my kiddo doing?"

 

Virgil laughs. "Better." He curls into Patton more. "Love ya, Dad." 

 

Nemo comes and sits on Virgil's other side, poking the emo trait in the stomach. "Hey! What about me? I'm your dad too!" he teases.

 

Virgil smirks back. "You're more like the babysitter. Annoying, but fun to mess around with."

 

Offended snake noises.

 

Nico chuckles, glad to be back with his family.

 

Logan comes back with a giant bowl of popcorn. "Is everything set up?" He puts it on the coffee table.

 

"Yup!" Nemo says, handing Logan the remote and grabbing a piece of popcorn with his snake tongue, earning a playful slap to the back from Virgil.

 

"Rude." Virgil says with a smile, shaking his head.

 

Logan starts the movie and sits next to Nemo. Patton looks at Nemo and gives him the puppy dog eyes. His eyes glancing at the popcorn.

 

Nemo smiles at Patton and grabs a handful of popcorn, placing them one at a time in Patton's mouth, Virgil caught between them and scowling. A piece falls in his hair. "That's it!" he declares, standing up and walking over to Logan, curling up in his lap. Nemo laughs and moves closer to Patton.

 

Logan holds onto Virgil. "I knew you would be back" he whispers into his ear. 

 

Virgil smirks and raises a brow. He pulls Logan down into a deep kiss then nips Logan's ear.

 

Nico looks at the popcorn, then at the others, then back at the popcorn. He wants some... He's just not sure if he's allowed...

 

Roman looks at Nico then at Nemo. "Well don't hog the popcorn Nemo. Hand the bowl over."

 

Nemo laughs. "Fine. Though it doesn't seem like Analogical is going to have any. They're too busy eating each other..." he smirks as Virgil blushes, but continues nibbling the edge of Logan's ear and down his neck.

 

Nico blushes lightly and takes the popcorn. "Thank you." he says to Nemo, who nods. He grabs some then lifts the bowl up for Roman.

 

Roman takes some popcorn. "Thank you, sunshine. Now everyone quite! we are watching a masterpiece."

 

Nico laughs lightly and moves a bit until he can comfortably watch the movie and forget where he just came from for a bit...


	6. Singed

The credit roll and almost everyone is a sleep except for Patton. He stares at his bandage hands in pain. He looks at the Nemo peaceful sleeping on topof him. He doesn't want to move but his hands are burning up and he doesn't know howmuch longer he can keep still.

 

Nico smiles as Roman snores, then notices Patton's grimace. He carefully gets off of Roman and moves over to Patton, looking him in the eyes softly as to ask, _'what's wrong?'_

 

Patton looks at him and shows his shaking hands. "Burning, can't move" he whispers not wanting to wake anyone. He squeezes his eyes close trying to ignore the pain. "Kit...kitchen"

 

Nico nods and carefully lifts Nemo off his lap, giving Patton space to move. He follows the other into the kitchen and finds the abandoned first aid kit. He opens it and searches for fresh bandages and burn cream. He moves over and gestures for Patton to sit down and lean against the cabinet. He fills a bowl of water and sets it down next to him, unwrapping the old bandages as pain free as he can, which isn't much.

 

Patton bites his cheeks trying to make as little of noise as possible. Once there off Patton sticks his hands into the cold water relaxing to the touch. He pulls them out and let's Nico put the burn cream on.

 

"You're doing so good." Nico says, offering him and encouraging smile. He smooths the cream on Patton's palms and fingers, then wraps his hands again. He picks up the bowl of water and puts it in the sink, rinses his hands off, then sits down next to Patton, giving the other a moment to recover.

 

"Thank you" Patton smiles at him. _'I'm so useless, I can't even help myself. Stupid.'_

 

Nico suddenly grips Patton's shoulder, firm but lovingly. "Stop." he says with a frown. "Stop saying that."

 

"Sorry..." He sighs and looks at his hands. "I never realized how much I use my hands until Icouldn't. I try to help and I either make it worst or I'm told no. Logan been get moreannoyed with me. I know it."

 

"Hmm." Nico says, nodding in thought. "What if... You try  _not_  forcing yourself upon a situation. As in, you let them come to you when they need help, when they can't bear it on their own?" he suggests.

 

Patton laughs "No one in this family willing asks for help. If I don't push nothing gets done." He frowns.

 

Nico nods and looks away. "I did..." he mumbles.

 

"Oh, I didn't mean to apply anything to you specifically." Patton curls up on himself. "...I never did apologize for almost killing you...sorry. My biggest mistake."

 

"What?" Nico asks, eyes narrowing as he turns to look at Patton. "Oh. Oh, Patton, that's not what I meant. Come here." he draws Patton into a hug, being careful of his hands. "Shh... It's okay. I forgive you. And honestly, you were justified. I was attacking your family. You were trying to protect them. I- admire you for that." he says, quickly changing his words last second.

 

"That makes one of us... Logan worry. I don't blame him for that. He like a mom in that way."

 

Nico smiles. "Yes, he is." he thinks to himself. He often hears Logan's thoughts of not being or doing enough for his family, that he was failing them. He thinks to when he was trying to protect Roman. Logan kept following him, making sure Roman got to his room and healed. Nico shakes his head. This whole family was such a mess of lies and insecurities... He pulls Patton closer and soothes the other's hair.

 

Patton leans into the touch. "I'm happy your here." He closes his eyes, he was tired.

 

Nico smiles. "I am too. Trust me, I am very happy here." He keeps petting Patton until he falls asleep, then picks him up and moves him to the couch. He sits down on the floor and leans against Roman's leg, staying awake a while longer to keep watch, but eventually sleep overtakes him.

 

Logan wakes up the next morning surrounded by sleeping sides. He notices Nico made his way to the floor at some point. He slowly gets up and moves to Patton. He checks his bandages seeing that there new he smiles and makes his way to the kitchen to make breakfast.

 

Nemo groans when Logan moves, having used the logical side's leg as a pillow. He curls up in the abandoned spot, being drawn to consciousness but refusing to open his eyes. Then he smells coffee... He sits up slowly, smiling and seeing everyone on or around the couch except for Logan. He glances over to the kitchen and sees him in there. He gets up, carefully stepping over Virgil's legs that are falling off the couch and makes his way there. "Morning, Lo." Nemo whispers with a smile.

 

"Morning Nemo" he slides him a cup of coffee. "How did you sleep?" Also keeping his volume low as to not wake the others.

 

Nemo picks it up and sips it. "Actually, really well. It was nice to have everyone together again." He leans against the counter, examining his cup.

 

Logan flips the pancake. "Yes, it was very peaceful. We should do it again."

 

Nemo nods. "Is there anything I can do?" He asks, gesturing to the food.

 

"Actually, there is." He looks at Nemo. "I need you to get Patton to stay in his room. Doesn't matter if he shows it or not but he is an emotional ticking time bomb that can go off at any time. He needs to stay in his room" He looks up as he thinks "I would say for 3 days constantly."

 

Nemo's mouth opens, and he stares at Logan a moment, processing what he just said. "Okay." He finally says. "I can do that. Do you want me to bring him there now?"

 

"No, he can eat breakfast first. I'm sorry that was a lot. I'm just worry about him."

 

"No, it's fine. I'm glad you told me. I... had no clue." Nemo says, sipping his coffee some more. "Thank you for taking such good care of us all, Logan." He suddenly says, looking up at the other.

 

"Of course, it's my pleasure, thank you for understanding." Logan holds up a plate full of pancakes. "Pancakes are ready. Can you wake the others while I set up the table?"

 

Nemo nods and sets his cup down on the counter. He gently shakes Virgil, the emo trait groaning and throwing a pillow over his face. "Wake up, midnight." Nemo says with a smirk, earning a hiss from Virgil. Nemo leans in. "Your boyfriend made pancakes... If you don't eat them, I will." He whispers. A pillow flies at his face as Virgil leaps up from the couch and heads over. Nemo chuckles and moves to Roman, squeezing the fanciful side's shoulders and gently shaking him. "Roman... Breakfast is ready."

 

Roman groans and sits up he looks around till he finds Nemo on the ground at his feet. He shakes his shoulder. "My love why are you on the floor?"

 

Nico mumbles and slides off Roman's leg, still asleep. He grabs Roman's foot and rests his head on it like a pillow, refusing to open his eyes.

 

"Come on sunshine, it's breakfast time." He goes a pull him into a hug and off his foot.

 

Nico grumbles, refusing to cooperate and just staying limp in Roman's arms.

 

Roman laughs as he kisses Nico face. "You’re tired aren't ya." 

 

Nico hums and smiles during the kiss. He nods sleepily and curls up more in Roman's arms. "Sleeeeeeeeeeep..." he mumbles.

 

Nemo chuckles and moves to Patton. He wraps his arms around him and kisses his cheek. "Wake up, honey." He purrs.

 

Patton turns away and groans "5 more minutes."

 

Nemo smiles and scratches Patton's head and back. He leans closer and bleeps Patton's nose. "Breakfast is ready. Lo made it." He says.

 

Patton leans into the touch. "Oh alright." Still not opening his eyes he stretches out his arms. "Carry me"

 

Nemo laughs and carefully wraps his arms around Patton, lifting him up and carrying him to the table. He pauses and looks back at Roman and Nico. "Having some trouble there?" He asks with a smirk.

 

"He tired, I'll give him a few more minutes" Roman pets his hair and rubs his back. Nico moans and falls back asleep.

 

Nemo chuckles and brings Patton to the dining room, pulls out a chair, and sets him in it. He stands up and kisses Patton's forehead, then grabs his glass and goes to the kitchen to fill it. "What do you want to drink?"

 

"Coffee..." He lays on his arms. Logan walks over and slides a plate of pancakes to Patton and rubs his back.

 

Virgil grabs his own cup and gets up, heading to the kitchen. He notices Nemo eyeing Patton nervously. "What's up?" Virgil asks him.

 

"Hmm? Oh, nothing." Nemo says. Virgil raises a brow and Nemo sighs in defeat. 

 

He whispers in Virgil's ear. "Logan said Patton needs to stay in his room. He's emotionally unstable." 

 

Virgil nods. "After breakfast then?"

 

Nemo nods in confirmation. 

 

"Okay, I can come hang if you guys want too?"

 

"I'm sure he won't mind." Nemo says with a smile.

 

Virgil smiles back and finishes getting his drink. They both come back to the table and take a seat.

 

Patton tries to pick up his fork to immediately drop it. Logan glares at him. "Patton stop, just wait for Nemo." Patton groans at him.

 

Nemo comes and sits next to Patton. He puts Patton coffee down, rubbing his shoulder gently and holding up a bite for him. Patton hums as he takes a bit. Virgil eats and sneakily scrolls through his phone under the table. Logan finished setting the table. "ROMAN ARE YOU COMING?" 

 

"IN A FEW" Roman yells back.

 

Nico jerks awake at the yelling, smacking his head into Roman's jaw. "Are you okay?" He immediately asks, checking Roman and ignoring his throbbing head.

 

Roman bends his head back holding his jaw. "It's alright I've had worst. I shouldn't have scared you.”

 

Nico shakes his head, making it worse but ignores it. “No, you didn’t mean to. Hold on.” He says, getting up and heading into the kitchen to grab an ice pack. He comes back and carefully presses it to Roman’s jaw, looking at him lovingly and concerned.

 

"Thank you love, we should go get some breakfast." He says as he gets up from the couch.

 

Nico gets up and follows him, taking a seat next to Roman. He notices Virgil nervously glancing at Nemo then back down. He smirks when he figures out what he’s doing and Virgil glares at him as if to say, _‘shut up’_. Nico chuckles and takes a bite of his pancake.

 

Logan finally sits down between Virgil and Nico. "How did everyone sleep?" He asks to start conversation.

 

“It was cozy and safe.” Nico says softly with a smile, slouching a little. “It was nice.”

 

Roman puts his arm around Nico and kiss his cheek.

 

“You’re a good pillow.” Virgil says to Logan, not looking up at him.

 

"Good to know" Logan smirks at him. Patton sips his coffee through a straw. Letting the caffeine work its magic.

 

Nico smiles and leans on Roman, adrenaline wearing off.

 

Nemo holds up another bite for Patton. “Hey, I was thinking you and I could have a sleep over in your room?” He asks Patton.

 

"Hmm no thanks, how about your room? It's been awhile since I've seen your snakes." Patton says then takes the bite. He knows what this is about as he takes a glance at Logan.

 

Nemo bites his lip and tries again. “I can bring them to your room. I’d really like to be in yours.” He says. 

 

Virgil glances up between them and Logan.

 

Patton frowns, he sits up straight and fully looks at Logan. "I know what you’re doing, and the answer is no Logan."

 

"Patton be reasonable, you need to rest." Logan protest.

 

"I've rest enough." He glares at Logan.

 

"You know what I mean. You’re not emotional stable."

 

"What do you know about emotions _Logic_ " Patton spat out.

 

Logan eyes widen. "Guys calm down" Roman tired but they ignore him. Logan slams his hands down and stands up.

 

"For goodness sake Patton go to your room!"

 

"Stop acting like my mom!" Patton threw back standing up as well.

 

“I’ll stop acting like a mom when you stop acting like a stubborn child!” Logan quickly bites back glaring at him. Patton stops.

 

Nico jumps and Virgil stares between them. Virgil gets up and gently takes Logan’s arm. “Come on.” He says, trying to lead Logan away. 

 

Nico gets up and moves to Patton, placing a hand on Patton’s forehead. Nemo watches him wearily, resisting the urge to growl at the action. 

 

“Patton... please.” Nico says. “If not for your own health, then for ours.”

 

Patton shakes his head and pushes his hand away. He looks down. "Thanks for breakfast." He sinks out. 


	7. Search

Logan falls back into his chair. He covers his face with his hands. "That could have gotten better..." 

 

Roman looks around very confused. "What just happened? What's wrong with Patton?"

 

Nemo and Nico exchange a look before Nemo nods and sinks out. Nico looks over to Logan for him to explain. Virgil bites his lip and buries himself in his phone again, trying to avoid panicking.

 

Logan sighs "Patton is in critical condition. He unbalance and is quick to mood swings, outburst and irrational decisions. Usually he can just rest in his room and be back to normal in an hour, but for some unknown reason he refused to stay in his room for more than 5 minutes. Recent events have made things worse and yet he still won't go to his room. If he doesn't go into his room soon he will fall into a coma. I'm hoping to prevent that or at least hope this one doesn't last that long."

 

Roman looked at Logan "What do you mean 'this one'. This has happened before?"

 

Logan cover his mouth, _'shit'_.

 

Virgil glares at Logan, now paying full attention. “Logan...” he warns. 

 

Nico looks at them all nervously. “What happened?” He asks.

 

Logan sighs looking ashamed. "A long time ago when Patton first found out about his switching emotions power he came to me with questions. We did some experiments to figure out its potential. We found out that he can take someone emotion away, but he must replace it with another one. This means that Patton needs to give them his emotions. For example, to take away someone sadness he gives them his happiness and takes that person sadness. This is why he gets unbalance. We also found put that the new emotion over takes him and that he always passes out when it passes."

 

"So, what happened?" Roman asked a little mad that Logan lie to him about how often Patton uses his ability.

 

"We were doing an experiment were Patton was supposed to take my calmness and replace it with his worries. He told me before we started that he wasn't feeling well but when I gave him the option to stop he said he was fine. So, we did the switch and he went into shock and fell into a 3 day coma."

 

"How did we not know about this!" Roman yelled. "How didn't we know he was in a coma for 3 DAYS!"

 

Virgil walks over and stands by Roman, placing a hand on his shoulder signaling him to calm down, but still glaring at Logan. 

 

Nico shrinks in on himself. "How were you all affected?" Nico asks quietly, gaining everyone's attention. He shrinks more when he sees them all looking at him. "You'd have no emotions? If he falls into a coma again?" He clarifies, trying to sit at least a little bit taller but ends up hunching his shoulders still.

 

"We will be fine. Patton doesn’t manage our emotions. Thomas will suffer, and Patton suffers. As for how you didn't know...my new worry turns into panic after Patton fell. I put him into his room lock his door and... pretend to be Patton until he woke up..." Logan kept his head down in shame.

 

Virgil stares at him in shock. “You-? Patton? How- How didn’t- what?”

 

"I would have to admit it wasn't easy. You weren’t that social back then Virgil, only coming out for meals."

 

"I can't believe that you were able to play Patton." Roman was shock and impress.

 

“Even logic can be deceitful...” Nico mumbles to himself. He sits, staring at the table and thinking to himself for a while. “That’s why you’ve been overworking yourself to take care of everyone... you were trying to make up for what happened...” he says, looking up at Logan. “You’re insecure about your ability to care for them.” He looks Logan in the eye.

 

Logan sighs. "I shouldn't have push him. After he woke up I told him not to switch emotions anymore. He agreed and hadn't done it again until recently. Now he unbalance and I can't help but worry."

 

Nico nods. “Nemo went to talk to him... we’ll see how that goes. Which brings up another thing.” He says with a sigh. “I think... Nemo and I... we’re... like twins...” 

 

Virgil examines him a moment. “That makes sense. You came from him.”

 

Nico feels his heart start racing. “Not all of me...” he mumbles.

 

Logan looks up at him happy to have a change of topic. "What makes you say that? I agree with Virgil that it makes sense, but why do you think that?"

 

“Just... we’re able to... understand each other? Like through glances and minor things like that. Like siblings...” Nico drums his fingers on the table in thought, grimacing at the irremovable black on them.

 

"Fascinating, I wouldn't mind talking to you and Nemo about this at a later time."

 

“Hmm. Ya, sure.” Nico says, rubbing at his hands and neck, letting out a frustrated huff.

...

Patton walks the dark halls. He needed time to think. 

 

 _'stubborn child'_ rings in his head. He doesn't know why that bother him so much.

 

Patton keeps walking. He doesn't feel like he’s getting anywhere. He sits down not seeing the point anymore. The takes a deep breath, he had laugh, scream, and cry in the span of 5 minutes. He just needs time to relax. He doesn't need his room. The subscape is peaceful when your all by yourself and not worrying about if the others are ok. He could rest here, it feels safe.

...

Nemo rises up in Patton’s room. “Patton?” He calls gently. He searches the room and doesn’t find him. He goes to his own room. “Patton?” He calls again. Still nothing. He checks everyone’s rooms except Nico’s. No sign of Patton. He’s getting worried now. He sinks out to the dining room. “I can’t find him.” He says, unable to hide the worry in his voice. 

 

Nico frowns. “You checked everywhere?”

 

“Everyone’s rooms except for yours...”

 

Nico gets up and sinks out.

…

Patton breath has slow down, he looks at the distance not sure what he’s looking at. _'This is fine, I'm safe here. Peace and quiet, I'll rest and go back. Things will go back to normal. How long have I been here? minutes? Hours? Seconds? doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore. Just rest.'_

 ...

Nico rises up in his room, the shadows and cold greeting him with Icey fingers. He shivers as he feverishly looks around. He really doesn’t want to be here longer than needed. He doesn’t find him and sinks out, the shadows trying to keep him there with their lies. When he appears back into the dining room he gasps for air like he was underwater. He sees Roman and immediately throws himself into his love’s arms.

 

"Love are you alright?" Roman holds him giving him a reinsuring hug. 

 

"Did you find Patton?" Logan asked getting very worry. _'He ran away because of me'_

 

Nico breathes deeply and clings to Roman. “I-I’m fine. I didn’t find P-Patton, though.” He whispers. 

 

Nemo frowns. “Where did he go then?”

 

Virgil bites his lip. “Please, Pat... no...”

 

"There only two more places I can think of and I don't like either one of them. It would be stupid to go to either." Logan said as he starts pacing.

 

"You did say Patton makes irrational decisions..." Roman mutter as he tries to comfort his love.

 

“It doesn’t matter.” Nemo says. “We need to find him and bring him back.”

 

Virgil nods. “No matter what, we’re going, where ever he went.”

 

"We need to find him first. Logan what are our options?" 

 

Logan sighs "Either the dark side where he could be dead while we speak or the subscape. I'm hoping for that one."

 

Nico shoots up from Roman's lap. "None of you are going there." he says.

 

"Well someone has to go get him." Logan said. "Either way Patton can't escape by himself."

 

"When we went after Roman we were all fine in the subscape for a while." Virgil says.

 

Nemo nods. "Okay. Roman, Logan, and Virgil, you three will check the subscape. Nico and I will check the dark side."

 

Nico glances at Roman nervously. "What about the imagination?" he quietly asks.

 

"We'll check it on the way to the subscape." Virgil says.

 

"Alright, meet back here in an hour to regroup." Logan said then sink out.

 

Roman kisses Nico "be careful" and he sinks out.

 

Nico nods. "You too..." he whispers, clutching his necklace.

 

Virgil notices. "Don't worry, I'll keep an eye on him." he says with a wink.

 

Nico smiles and nods his thanks as Virgil sinks out.

 

Nemo turns to him. "You ready?" he asks, to which Nico hesitantly nods. Nemo takes his hand and they sink out together.

...

Logan, Roman, and Virgil sink into the subscape. "Alright let’s fine him and get him out." They start walking scream his name to no avail. Then Roman sees something.

 

"Over there!" He yelled running towards the figure. Logan follow behind. "Patton!" Roman pulls him into a hug. Patton doesn't say anything or does anything. "Patton?" Roman looks at his face. Patton looks at him blankly. It takes him a minute, but he gives a hum to show that he still awake.

 

Virgil runs over and strokes Patton's hair, noting his gray and distant eyes. "We need to get him to his room! Now!"

 

"Don't" Patton said.

 

"Patton why don't you want to go back to your room so badly." Logan asked.

 

"Can't face it." Patton answer not really looking at anyone.

 

“Face what?" Roman asks still hold him.

 

"Memories"

 

Logan eyes widen as he realizes. "Oh Patton..."

 

"What?" Virgil asks. "I thought you loved nostalgia?"

 

"Not when it's watching yourself beat someone close to death or watch your love one kill another. Patton room not only filters emotions but also memories." Logan corrected.

 

"Can't face it..." Patton replied.

 

"O-oh." is all Virgil can manage. He sits next to Patton and pulls him into a hug. "But- can't like... Nemo just... Do his snake magic stuff and take those bad memories away or make them less prominent?"

 

Patton shakes his head. "wrong...bad"

 

"Patton room just needs to filter them. The problem is that Patton needs to be in his room to do and his room will show the memory as it is being filter. Nevertheless, we should talk about this back home you can't stay here."

 

"Can't...shut down" 

 

"Yes, we know that why you need to leave." Roman argue. Patton shook his head.

 

"No Patton right. Going back will jump start his emotions." Logan looks up. "It will throw him into shock." Patton nods.

 

"Then what do we do?" Virgil asks, breathing increasing as he rubs Patton's back.

 

"Either we take him back and he goes into a coma or he stays and still goes into a coma." Logan couldn't wrap his head around this. There was no safe option. He going to fall into a coma, he has failed Patton.

 

"We are not leaving him here! We are just going to have to bring him back."

 

Virgil thinks for a moment, lost. "There's... Nowhere safe to take him..." the truth of the situation not sticking.

 

Logan sighs in defeat, he holds Patton hand. "Patton do you trust us." Patton nods his head. "Alright, Roman pick him up we're leaving." Logan stands up. Roman nods and stands up with Patton in his arms.

 

Virgil stands, still petting Patton's hair. A coma sounds scary. He doesn't want to see Patton in one, but it doesn't seem like there's any other way. "It's okay, you're gonna be okay." he says, mostly trying to convince himself.

 

And with that, they sink out.


	8. Rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: Violence and Torture, Implied Non-Con.  
> Please stay safe!

'Team N' rises up in the dark side of the mind scape. Nemo looks around, pulling his black and yellow cloak tighter to himself. It's just how he remembered it. An exact replica of the light side, except it's colder. Much colder. There's no love here. Not real love at least. Lust once tried to convince him he was in love with him. That didn't last long, given Nemo could hear all of the other's lies. He hopes they won't run into any of the other dark sides while they're here...

 

"N-Nemo?" Nico whimpers. 

 

Nemo turns around and sees the other on the ground, huddled into his gray cloak, hood up. "I'm right here." he says, causing the other to jump and spin around, searching for the source of the voice. Nemo frowns and lays a hand on Nico's shoulder as the other lets out a surprised scream before slapping a hand over his mouth, shaking. Nemo sighs. He doesn't have time for this. "Nico. Stop playing games. We don't have time for this. Patton could be dying." he says sharply.

 

Nico looks close to tears. "I- can't see you..." he whispers, fearing Nemo's wrath. He did kill him after all. All it would take was one negative influence and that could easily happen again.

 

Nemo's eyes narrow in thought. "Oh!" he suddenly stands, snapping his fingers so the yellow in his outfit changes to orange. "Is that better?" he asks.

 

Nico looks up at him and smiles, finally relaxing now that he can see he isn't alone. "Yeah." he says. Nemo offers a hand and pulls him up. "Thanks." Nico says.

 

Nemo nods and moves towards the stairs, Nico following close behind. They check some of the rooms that have open doors, the others they quietly sneak by. It isn't uncommon for Nico to notice Nemo linger on one object or another and shiver before tearing himself away. 

 

One room takes Nemo longer than usual to enter. Once they do, the first thing Nico notices is weapons. Practical and impractical. Big or small. Deadly or just painful. Whatever it was, it was here. And it holds the terrible smell of blood. Nico glances at Nemo, who just stands in the center of the room, as if watching something play out. He walks closer towards the other.

 

"Nemo?" he calls, but the deceitful trait seems lost in his own world.

 

"What a pleasant surprise..." a dark voice from the door says. Nico spins around to see a person with their same face, covered in scars. He plays with a knife in his hand boredly, but his eyes say different as he grins at Nemo. " _Deceit._ " the dark side sneers as Nemo trembles. 

 

Nico steps protectively towards him. "Who are you?" he asks, receiving a dark chuckle that makes his skin crawl.

 

"Why! Deceit, darling! After all the  _fun_  we've had together? You don't happen to mention me once?" the dark side says dramatically.

 

"I'm sorry..." Nemo manages to whisper.

 

Suddenly, the dark side is in front if Nico. "Name's Malice." he says before pain explodes across Nico's face as he falls to the ground, passing out soon after hearing a strangled cry from Nemo as his body lands next to Nico's.

 

...

 

They sink back into the commons. Patton gasp as he spazzes in Roman arms then goes limp. Logan sighs "Put him in his room."

 

"but-" Roman started

 

"He won't heal otherwise, we're killing two birds with one stone. He won't be awake to see the memories be filter." Roman nodded and walks to Patton room. Logan sinks into the couch putting his head into his hands and sigh.

 

Virgil carefully sits down next to him and massages his neck. "You did the best you could." he says gently.

 

"I shouldn't have yelled at him..."

 

"Shh..." Virgil wraps his arms around Logan and bury his face into him to hide his unshed tears. "It was coming. You knew that. That was just the final push... It's not all your fault."

 

"I know...it just hurts."

 

Roman walked down the stairs. "Alright Patton is in bed." He sits on the couch and looks at his watch. "We have 15 minutes before Nemo and Nico come back. How are we going to break it to them that Patton is in a coma?"

 

Virgil continues to rub Logan's back. "We tell them the good news. We found him. Bad news is he's in a coma. Good news is, he'll come out of it." he says, not quite believing the last part for himself but saying it anyways.

 

Logan sighs and stands up. "I'm going to take a nap...let me know when they get back." He makes his way up the stairs.

 

"Okay." Virgil says, then looks at Roman. "How are you holding up?"

 

"I wish I could have done more to help. I'm also worry about Nemo and Nico. I don't like that there in the dark side. It doesn't sound like a nice place. I wish I could just tell them that we found him already, so they could come back."

 

...

 

The first thing Nico's aware of is restraint. He can't move. There’re ropes holding him tight against a chair. The next thing he notices is a strong and resilient headache. He groans and rolls his head to his right to see Nemo ties in a chair next to him, head hanging forward and unconscious. Nico's head spins. It feels sticky, and it's in his hair. 

 

Someone's hand grabs his hair and pulls his face to look at them. It's another side, though he doesn't recognize them. He sees their lips moving but can't make out what they're saying. A sharp pain enters his side and he scream against a cloth inside his mouth and around his head. Tears stream down his face as the other side smirks and twists the blade, causing him to squirm. Nico closes his eyes. He's already died once. How much revenge could the universe possibly want?

 

…

 

Virgil nods. "I know. Nico didn't want to leave you." he says with a chuckle. "I promised him I would keep you out of trouble until he got back. I'm sure it won't be long now."

 

The 15 minutes pass, and Virgil can't help the knot of dread forming in his stomach. _'They won't find him there. They should be back by now. What's taking so long? The dark side isn't that much bigger than the light side.'_

 

Roman taps his foot getting impatient he looks at Virgil with worry on his face.

 

Virgil looks away and fidgets with his hoodie strings. "I... Uh... Should probably go look for them, huh?" he asks, really not wanting to hear the answer. He left the dark sides for a reason.

 

He frowns at him "Virgil I know you, you don't want to go. You don't have to, I'm sure they can handle themselves. Were just worry, maybe they just lost track of time."

 

Virgil nods. "I know... I'll give them 10 more minutes. If they don't show up by then, I'm going after them."

 

...

 

He still tries to scream, though his voice left him ages ago. All he knows anymore is pain. Pain. Pain. No wonder Nemo was a mess. His eyes roll to see Nemo panting in the chair next to him, scales stained in red. He looks up at Nico from beneath his bangs. Nico offers him a tired smile before a crack sounds and his legs scream in pain from the whip that just left them. The side in front of him, Malice, laughs and prepares to strike Nemo.

 

"S'op!" Nico screams muffled by the gag. 

 

Malice's arm lowers and his cold gaze settles upon Nico. He walks closer, grabbing Nico's jaw and yanking it up. "Why?" he purrs with an undertone of annoyance at being interrupted. 

 

Nico's heart pounds in fear but he puts on a brave facade. "w'hat do you want?" he asks the best he can though being muffled.

 

Malice smirks and pulls their faces closer. Nico shifts uncomfortably. Malice stares at him, eyes dark, almost black, without remorse. "I want to see you squirm." he lifts Nico's head back and bites his neck hard with surprisingly sharp teeth. Nico screams and thrashes about, trying to kick at his attacker, but his legs are tied down. 

 

Nemo closes his eyes and looks away. He knows. He knows exactly what Nico feels. For years... Malice's toy...

 

Malice lets go and steps back grinning. Nico coughs and fights against his restraints with new vigor. "Oh, I'm definitely not letting you go for a  _long_  time." Malice says. "Though, I do have you to thank, Deceit." he steps closer to Nemo. He remains pliable in Malice's hands as his chin is lifted. "You were always my favorite..." he pushes himself against Nemo, encasing his mouth with his own. Nemo doesn't really kiss him back, just kind of sits there and accepts whatever Malice does to him, knowing better than to fight.

 

Nico doesn't and continues his desperate attempts at freedom. He suddenly feels a hand wander down his stomach. His eyes widen, and he looks to Nemo for help, but the other won't look at him, trying his best to mentally forget everything that's happening. Nico screams for anyone to hear him, for someone to come rescue them, but there's no one there.

 

...

 

Virgil rises up in the dark side of the mindscape after waiting and still no sign of the two. The cold slaps him in the face as he draws his hoodie closer and dashes to the shadows to hide in them. He changes the purple to black to hide himself better. He hears screaming from upstairs and shivers. He used to listen to those screams well into the night until-

 

Wait.

 

"Nico." Virgil gasps, realising the owner of the screams and quickly but stealthily makes his way up the stairs. He dodges light and opening doors. The dark sides rarely spent a moment together except when trying to nearly kill each other. And there was one side who enjoyed the pain of others more than anyone. 

 

He stands near Malice's open door, as the other loved to show off his trophies to passer-by-ers, close enough to see, far enough to stay hidden. There's two people tied down on chairs and Virgil wants to cry when he sees Nico's back arch as another jolt of pain runs through him. Nemo is beside him, panting and apathetic. Malice towers above both of them, laughing.

 

He can't take anymore. He sinks out to Logan's room and climbs into the logical side's bed, curling up next to him, crying. He has to help them. But he's so scared.

Logan wakes up from his rest by the sound of crying. He looks to see Virgil curl up next to him. "Virgil what's wrong?" He pulls him into an embrace.

 

Virgil sobs loudly. "N-Nemo... N-Nico... They... Malice..." he clutches Logan's shirt and cries into it.

 

Logan eyes widen as he figures out what he’s saying. He holds him tight. "What room are they in?"

 

"Dark side... Malice's." Virgil suddenly grips Logan tighter. "You can't go. The dark side will corrupt you." he says looking him in the eyes.

 

"Their trap, someone has to get them out. If I know where I'm going I can be in and out in seconds." Logan tries to reinsure, him and himself. He doesn't like the idea, but someone needs to get them out.

 

Virgil shakes his head. “N-No. You can’t. There’s too many... Nemo and Nico are too injured... Malice- “he gasps and buries his face into his boyfriend.

 

Logan rubs circle into his back. "Virgil breath. In for 4..."

 

Virgil nods and breathes. He can still hear Nico’s desperate screams. He can still see the pain in his face and the apathy in Nemo’s. He cries silently and clutches Logan. “I’m going with you.” He says, determined.

 

Logan shake his head. "Virgil you’re a panic mess, I can't do that to you. I know you don't want to go there."

 

"But you can't go there without a guide." He says, sitting up. "I'm going. That's final." He says, eyes daring Logan to try to stop him.

 

"Alright, let's go before Roman finds out. If he went he would try to pick a fight and we don't have time for that." Logan getting up and holds his hand.

 

Virgil nods. "Okay." He says, closing his eyes and sinking out. He reappears in the dark side's common room, Logan rising up beside him.

 

Logan felt a wave of cold hit him making he shiver. He could already feel a headache coming too. They needed to be fast.

 

"This way." Virgil whispers, taking to the shadows and creeping up the steps. Sobs and screams still fill the hallway, though they're weaker now.

 

"A waste of space! That's what you are! You aren't even a side! What do you have to offer Thomas, huh!?" Another muffled scream sounds at the end of the rant.

 

Virgil races to his previous hiding place, watching as Nico gasps for air, red stained cloak bunched up around him. A hand wraps around Nico's throat, his eyes widening and trying to kick and fight, only for the hand to tighten. He coughs, eyes becoming heavy, head pounding as darkness starts to- A slice to his leg interrupts his drifting off as he hoarsely screams, voice dead.

 

Malice laughs as Virgil looks over to Nemo who is unconscious, slouched at an unnatural angle against the ropes and chair.

 

"Look at you!" Malice says to Nico, who is trying to recover and prepare himself for another beating. "You're pathetic and weak! You don't deserve to be alive. You might as well die!" He steps closer and grabs Nico's jaw as the insecure side flinches. "The  _only_  reason you are still alive, is because I. Am.  _Allowing_. It. So be grateful,  _pet_."

 

Nico nods and trembles. Honestly, he would rather be dead. Honestly, he would kill himself to escape this if that was the only way. He couldn't take anymore. He tried to be strong. For Nemo. For Patton. For Roman. His love. His prince. He promised himself he would see him again. But his last memory of him already felt like an eternity ago.

 

Logan couldn't take it anymore. He was freezing, his mind racing. He looks around for something to use. He sees a big hammer. He jumps out of the shadows grabbing the hammer and smashing it against Malice head knocking him unconscious as he let's go of Nico jaw. Logan used so much force that he fell over. His mind still racing the room is spinning. He tries to get up but can't. He can't think, he can't breathe.

 

"LOGAN!" Virgil screams before he thinks. He races in and slams the door closed, locking it so none of the other dark sides can get in. He slides down to Logan's side. "Logan! Logan, breathe!" He looks up at Nemo and Nico, both severely injured and Logan can't get up and-

 

Panic. Panic. PANIC!

 

"Wirwil." Nico says through the gag, gaining the anxious side's attention. His eyes gesture down to his ropes. Virgil looks down at Logan once more then gets up and unties Nico. 

 

Nico groans and hisses as the ropes loosen and brush against his injuries. 

 

"Sorry." Virgil mumbles, working quickly.

 

"It's fine." Nico says, testing his shaking limbs. "Get Logan out of here, Nemo and I will follow shortly."

 

Virgil is about to say yes before thinking better of it. "Logan will just come right back."

 

Nico nods and shakily stands and walks over to Nemo, limping. Virgil goes back to Logan on the ground.

 

Logan shakes uncontrollably gasping for air that isn’t coming. He can’t see anything but he swears his eyes are open.  

 

It takes him a few minutes, but he soon gets the ropes loose enough for Nemo to slip through, but the lying trait doesn't budge. "Come on, Nemo. We need to go, now!" Nico pleads. Nemo just closes his eyes and lays his head back. Nico sighs and starts pulling the ropes over Nemo's head and slipping him out. He goes to pick him up, hissing in pain and nearly falling with the added weight. He carries Nemo over to Virgil and Logan and nods. 

 

Virgil looks down at Logan, stroking his forehead. "Okay, let's go."


	9. Bandage

They sink back I to the commons. Roman looks at them all locking eyes with Nico. "NICO" he makes his way over wanting to hold him but thinks better of it. "Lay down I'll get the first aid kit." Roman runs into the kitchen.

 

Nico nods, breathing deeply. He sets Nemo down beside himself and lays down, holding his hand. Between both of them, he judges he has more injuries than Nemo, but he still wants the other to be helped first. He pulls his hand up and sees the black now covered with red. Red? Why was it red? The carpet feels wet too... Weird. He lays his head down, unaware of how quickly he's breathing and bleeding out. 

 

_'It's okay. It's gonna be okay. Roman's here. Roman will take care of me.'_

 

Logan gasps for air shaking at the new heat. His head twitch, his vision burry. "Wkcjfjskaofnckz" he tries to go to the stairs, but he falls when he tries to stand. "Ancjdkgds".

 

"Shh! Logan! Please!" Virgil says, grabbing Logan from around the waist and laying on top of him to keep him on the ground. "Shh... Give yourself a minute." He feels bad for dragging Logan with him. He knew Logan would get shocked from traveling there and back, but he was scared.

 

Nemo still stares blankly at the ceiling, the wall, the couch, anything except the others.

 

Logan shakes his head "hxfjrosjcoom" he slaps the person holding him. Room, he needs to get to his room. 

 

Roman comes back with two kits, he looks at them both. He starts working on Nico. "Virgil I could use some help here. Can you patch up Nemo?" He looks over and sees him struggling with Logan. "What's wrong with Logan?"

 

Virgil shakes his head. He pins Logan's arm down and grits his teeth. "He's in shock. He came with me to the dark side."

 

"Take him to his room! Our room are personal healing champers." Roman ignore the fact that Logan was stupid enough to go there. 

 

"Kajcjfksroomzjcjfk" Logan keeps struggling.

 

"Okay." Virgil says, mentally slapping himself for forgetting that. He sinks out with Logan.

 

Nico shivers. He should feel warm, but he's so cold. Cold, and it's hard to breathe. He starts gasping. "Ro-Roman!" he manages, voice sore and weak from screaming.

 

Roman puts his attention back to Nico. "Shh it's alright I'm here. I'm working as fast as I can." He wraps his leg.

 

Nico groans. In the midst of being tortured his body had gone numb. It still hurt, but not as much. Now though, every poke and prod stung his body like a thousand needles. He tries to move away from Roman, but it hurts more. He wants to sleep. He wants to sleep and just forget about the pain so badly. He cries into the carpet. His side aches. He might have broken a rib. Maybe his skull

 

... 

 

Logan relaxes once he enters his room letting the logical energy wash over him. His breathing slower. Virgil tucks him into bed kissing him on the forehead. "AncIeckLovesnsYou" Virgil smiles at him.

 

"Love you too." And he sinks out.

 

…

 

Virgil rises up and takes the other first aid, setting to work on Nemo. Most of his injuries will be mental, he has a few bruises and cuts, but nothing completely terrible. Still, Virgil's concerned about him. Nemo's eyes remain closed, not even flinching as Virgil wraps him up. 

 

He finishes and looks over at Roman and Nico. His breath catches. There's blood everywhere, and it's not slowing down. He gets up and runs to the kitchen, grabbing some rags and coming back, kneeling beside Roman. "We have to slow the bleeding before we can bandage him." He says, panicked.

 

"You take the left I'll take the right." Roman ignore the blood stain everything, he wasn't going to lose his love again. He won't.

 

Virgil hands him a few rags. "Just keep constant pressure on the major wounds." He says, pressing on Nico's side and earning a pained gasp form him. He really hopes he's not pressing on anything broken. "He... We can't put him in his room..." Virgil says, looking up at Roman.

 

"I know..." He holds down one of the wounds.

 

Nemo groans and sits up, finally deciding to join in on the conversation. "He'll be fine."

 

Roman looks at Nemo."You sure? He's pretty bad right now. What happened?"

 

"Malice." Nemo says boredly. "He'll be fine. Malice knows the limits of the body. He wanted to play with him more, so he wouldn't do anything that would kill him, should he receive proper medical attention after each session." He says with a shrug.

 

Roman face went red from rage. "I'm going to kill him." He says coldly.

 

"Can't. Logan already did." Nemo says with a huff.

 

“What…” Roman looked up in shock.

 

"He... just hit his head." Virgil says, seriously hoping Logan didn't kill him. Logan didn't need that on his conscious. 

 

"With a hammer." Nemo points out.

 

"I thought you were asleep?" Virgil bites back, getting annoyed.

 

"Well, you thought wrong."

 

"Why didn't you get up when Nico freed you?"

 

"Didn't feel like it."

 

Virgil's grip on Nico's side increases as he forces himself to look away from Nemo, jaw clenching with annoyance.

 

"... didn't think he had it in him. Why didn't you tell me you were going to the dark side?" Roman switch to a new wound. He was surprised that Logan would attack. Logan hates physical fight, he would rather win a debate against his foe. Power of the mind and all. It's not like when Patton try to kill Nico, he couldn't control himself. Logan, he attended someone as a choice. The best choice in Roman mind, but still.

 

"Logan said to go without telling you so you wouldn't come trying to pick a fight. It was a rescue, not an invasion." Virgil says, wrapping up the wound he was on and checking for any other major ones. He spies blood in Nico's hair and wipes it away, moving his locks to search for the source.

 

Nemo chuckles dryly. "And you say I'm Deceit." 

 

Virgil looks up at him sharply. "Nemo! Go to your room! Now!"

 

"Why?" Nemo says with a sassy undertone.

 

"You need to rest!"

 

"How about no."

 

"Why not!?"

 

"BECAUSE MY ROOM LIES TO ME!" Nemo shouts, causing everyone to go silent.

 

"Nemo..." Is all Roman could say.

 

Nemo shakes his head and draws his knees up to himself. "You don’t- know what it's like." He says shakily. "To be the embodiment of lies..."

 

"Nemo I'm sorry... I didn't know." He looks down switching wounds. "We found Patton."

 

Nemo suddenly looks up, hope filling his eyes again. "Is he okay?" He asks.

 

Roman looks at Virgil then back down. "Yes...and no..." Not sure if he should tell him.

 

Virgil sighs. "When Patton... becomes emotionally unbalanced for too long... he... falls into a coma."

 

Nemo looks at him shocked. "H-How do you know that?"

 

"When Logan and Patton first found out about his ability to switch emotions, they did some experiments. After one of them, Patton fell into a coma for three days." Virgil says, looking back down at Nico who's drifting in and out of consciousness and whimpering.

 

"So... he's..." Nemo tries to start after some time thinking.

 

"I'm afraid so, the journey back from the subscape was too much for him. There was no other option." He brushes Nico hair out of his face.

 

Nemo nods. "C-Can I see him?"

 

Virgil looks up at Roman questioningly.

 

"I don't see why not. He's in his room. He will heal as long as he there. Don't expect for him to wake up anytime soon though."

 

Nemo nods and gets up, then stops. He bends down by Nico, rubbing the other's uninjured shoulder. "Thank you." He says quietly. 

 

Nico nods and Nemo stands up, sinking out.

 

Virgil looks between where Nemo used to be and Nico. "What was that?"

 

Nico shakes his head and passes out again. Virgil sighs and sits back a moment once the major injuries were bandaged. Some of them were bleeding through. He'll probably need stitches once Logan is better.

 

Patton lays in his bed unmoving. His chest slowly going up and down to show that he is breathing. Whispers of past conversations fill the noise.

 

Nemo slowly walks towards him. He goes to take his hand, then remembers the burns, so moves to his face and brushes his bangs out of his eyes. He leans down and kisses him, apathy shattering at seeing his love so vulnerable. He falls to his knees, leaning against the bed and crying. He gently strokes Patton's cheek. Eventually he stands up and crawls onto the bed, wrapping his arms protectively around Patton, spooning him. He vows to himself that he won't leave Patton's side until he wakes.

 

Roman sits up straight. "I think that's it." He looks at his love, it hurts him to see him like this, especially after everything he went through.

 

Virgil nods, staying silent and thinking. "Nemo said his room lies to him... that's why he doesn't like being in it. He's usually in Patton's or out here." He says. "My room harbors anxiety. Nico's room is full of insecurity..." He looks up the stairs in thought.

 

"Logan hold logic and rational thinking, Patton emotions and nostalgia and mine holds creativity, hopes and dreams. Our rooms should be helping us not hurting us."

 

Virgil nods. "But you three are positive traits... Nemo, Nico, and I are technically 'negative' ones. That's why I didn't think of taking Logan to his room until you told me. Because for me, it doesn't help me to go to my room." He drifts off, watching Nico's chest rise and fall. "I go to Logan's room. The logical feel it has helps me work through my anxiety. Nemo goes to Patton's room, to be reminded of the truth and the good memories, and occasionally work through the bad ones. There has to be somewhere for Nico, even though he isn't exactly like us, he's still one of us..."

 

"Maybe my room? We are opposites. Feeling some pride might be good for him."

 

"Ya..." Virgil says.  _Especially after the things Malice said to him..._  he thinks. "You can try taking him to your room, see if that does anything. I'll stay out here for a bit and check on the others occasionally." He says. "Be careful with him. Please. He may have some hidden injuries. I'll ask Logan to check him over once he feels better."

 

Roman nods his head. He slowly picks him up. And sinks into his room. He walks to his bed and lays him down. He then crawls in after him. He gives him space as to not hurt him more. "You’re going to be alright. I won't let anything hurt you. I promise."

 

“I know.” Nico says in a broken whisper. His hand reaches to find Roman’s.

 

Roman holds onto his hand calmly rubbing his thumb across his knuckles. "Rest sunshine"

 

Nico sighs and lets himself drift off, knowing he was safe and Roman was near.


	10. Repetition

Logan slowly woke up. He wasn't sure when he felt asleep. His memory was fuzzy. Heremembers entering the dark side with Virgil. _‘Virgil! Where was he?’_ He looked around hisroom but couldn't find him. He jumps out of bed and into the hall. "VIRGIL!"

 

Virgil jumps and races up the stairs to find Logan panicking in the hallway. “Lo! Hey! It’s okay!” He says, wrapping his arms around him. “Shhh... you’re okay.”

 

Logan wrap his arms around Virgil, he quickly calms down. "What happened? Are Nico and Nemo ok? I can't seem to remember what happened after we went into the dark side."

 

“Shh... ya. They’re- healing.” Virgil hesitates. “Nico had the most injuries. Stabbed and beaten... he might need stitches when you’re able to?”

 

Logan sighs in relief. "Yes of course, where is he?"

 

“He’s in Roman’s room. It’s been about an hour since I last saw them.” Virgil says.

 

Logan summons his medic kit. "I'll go check on him." He walks over to Roman door and knocks.

 

Virgil follows. “Roman? It’s me and Logan.” he calls through the door.

 

Logan slowly opens the door to find Roman and Nico asleep in bed. Logan closes the door. "I'll give him some time to rest. Come on." Logan starts walking down the stairs.

 

Virgil walks with him, watching him carefully. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asks.

 

Logan sits on the couch. "I'm fine, really. I feel well rested even, but just wondering why Ican't seem to remember the events. Maybe it’s the effect of going to the dark side or maybe something my room did." Logan ponder aloud.

 

Virgil nods. "You collapsed while we were there... And when we got back you were delirious. You really worried me there." He glances up at Logan.

 

Logan holds Virgil hand. "I'm sorry that I worry you, but it had to be done. Better me than Roman." Logan chuckles "Roman might have tried to kill Malice for hurting Nico."

 

Virgil's heart stops and he laughs nervously. He hugs Logan to hide his face from the logical side's searching eyes.

 

"Are you alright Virgil?" Logan asked rubbing his back.

 

"Ya. I'm fine." he says, sighing at Logan's touch.

 

"Where Nemo?"

 

_Shit. Shit. Shit. Logan. Why? Why do you ask both questions so-_

 

“He’s with Patton. Probably asleep.” He answers, hoping for the best.

 

Logan hums and relaxes. "How did he take the news?" He wonders.

 

“He asked how we knew he was going to go into a coma and I paraphrased what you told us. It was rushed because Nico was bleeding out. But... after Patton was mentioned, he seemed to snap out of his apathetic attitude. Then again, he was just forced to relive a few years of his life...” Virgil shakes his head.

 

"I wish we could have saved him from that. How are you holding up? You seem to be nervous I can understand why."

 

"Oh, I'm fine!" Virgil says with a smile.

 

Logan raise an eyebrow at him. "Patton is in a coma, Nico and Nemo are have been beaten and you are fine? I don't believe that."

 

Virgil closes his eyes and bites his lip, willing himself to not cry. He pulls Logan close. "You're right... Fine isn't the right word. I'm not fine, but I'm not hurt. I'm just... scared..."

 

Logan holds him tight. "I'm sure the worst is over. Everyone just needs to..." _'rest, that is all they have been doing. rest then something bad happens to rest again. How did we get stuck into this cycle of chaos?'_

 

Virgil shifts. "Logan?" he questions at the other's abrupt stop.

 

Logan blinks "Sorry I got lost in thought." He sighs "It just seems to be one thing after another. I'm surprise we haven't all went insane yet."

 

Virgil leans his head against Logan's chest, sighing and listening to his boyfriend's heartbeat. "I just wanna disappear." he says with a breathy laugh. "Just the two of us. Go on a date or something..."

 

Logan smiles "That would be nice...but I need to make sure everyone is ok. I would hate for something else to go wrong while we were out."

 

Virgil sighs. "We will. We'll check on everyone. We'll wait till they're better. Then we'll go to the imagination or something. And just... forget everything for a bit. Just focus on us for a night." He says, snuggling into Logan.

 

Logan nuzzles Virgil hair. "I would like that." He thinks for a moment. "How did we save Nico and Nemo?"

 

Virgil doesn't answer and pretends to be asleep. He can't stop seeing Logan lunging at Malice. It replays, over and over. Malice was far from innocent, but Logan? Kill someone? He didn't even know if Malice was dead or not...

 

Logan sighs, he kisses his head. "Sleep well Virgil."

 

Virgil hums and shifts until he's comfortable, waiting for Logan to fall asleep.

 

Logan relax embrace with his boyfriend. He closes his eyes burying his face into Virgil neck. He later falls asleep.

 

Virgil sighs, finally being able to drop the facade. He strokes Logan's hair, wishing he could sleep too, but the stress of everything keeps him wide awake.

 

...

 

_"You don't belong here! You aren't even a side!"_

_CRACK!_

_"STOP! PLEASE!"_

_Pain. Screaming. Fire. Pain. Pain. Pain._

 

"STOP!!!" Nico shoots up, screaming as the scabs rub against the sheets.

 

Roman shoots up. "Nico, Nico it's ok. Look at me, everything is ok." Roman wants to hold him but he fears of hurting him.

 

Nico spins around and stops screaming when he sees Roman. He tries to move closer to him, whimpering in pain.

 

"Shh it's ok, please relax don't strain yourself. I'm not going anywhere." He wraps his hand into his knowing that was a safe place to touch him.

 

Nico grips Roman’s hand fiercely. “Hold... me...” he chokes out, eyes squeezing shut in pain. “Please.”

 

Roman tries to hold him the best he can without hurting him further. "Shh I gotchu, I won't let anything bad happen, you're safe. I promise"

 

Nico cries and leans into Roman, trying to stay still to keep the cuts and bruises from hurting more.

 

"It's alright Sunshine, nothing will hurt you. You're never leaving my side again." Roman sounded determine, he was tired of seeing his love in pain. He didn't deserve it, he just wants him to be happy.

 

Nico’s sobs turn to gasps and whimpers, slowly crying himself back to sleep. “Love... you...” he whispers before he’s out again.

 

"I love you too..."

 

...

 

Virgil can’t take it anymore. He’s restless and exhausted. He carefully detangles himself from Logan before heading up the stairs. He quietly opens Patton’s door and sees him and Nemo asleep. He does the same at Roman’s room. He quietly walks in.

 

“Virgil?” Roman looks to see him enter. He was quite sure but Roman was on alert in case something happened.

 

“Ya. It’s me.” He says gruffly. “How is he?”

 

"In a lot of pain. Woke up screaming earlier. I'm tired of seeing him like this. I just want him tone happy." Roman answers rubbing anything that didn't hurt to try to comfort him.

 

Virgil nods. “Logan’s better, though he fell asleep again downstairs. But if the bleeding has slowed he shouldn’t need stitches. We’ll have to see.” He gazes at Nico for a moment. “I’ll be right back.” He says, walking out and down to Logan’s room. He comes back with some pain killers. “If that’s not enough, Logan has some morphine too.” He says, setting them down on the bedside table.

 

Roman smiles at him. "Thank you, how is Nemo?"

 

“Sleeping.” Virgil says with a sigh, pulling a Roman’s chair over and sitting on it. “Seems everyone is able to sleep but me...” he mumbles.

 

"What's keeping you up?" Roman asks kinda of already knowing he answer.

 

“Stress I guess.” Virgil answers, laying his head back. “Like... I just... need to make sure everyone’s okay. I couldn’t just rescue Nemo and Nico myself I had to drag Logan into it and everything.” He sighs, a hand falling over his face. “I’m just getting by, but I’ll be fine.”

 

"Hmm you could try taking Logan sleeping pills. That should knock you out. Get some rest while everything is peaceful." Roman suggest.

 

Virgil sighs. “But what if- “

 

"I'll keep watch. Everything will be fine." He gives him a reinsuring smile.

 

Virgil thinks for a moment then sighs. “Fine. But if you need me, wake me up.” He says, despite knowing he won’t wake up from the sleep meds. He gets up and puts Roman’s chair back before leaving the room. He pauses at the door. “Thank you.” He says, looking back.

 

“No problem.”

 

Virgil turns and leaves, walking past Patton’s room and suddenly feeling a wave of anxiety overtake him. It was probably nothing, but he opens the door anyways, just to be sure. He looks around. Nemo isn’t there. He steps inside the room, heart beating faster. 

 

_‘Something’s wrong. Something’s terribly wrong.’_

 

He turns and looks in the closet. One of the shirts are swaying a bit. He steps closer, eyes trained on it when a hand suddenly covers his mouth, keeping him from screaming. He feels the world start caving in, darkness quickly engulfing him as he feels himself be lowered to the floor.


	11. Now I’m Insecure

Logan wakes up, he looks around but can't find Virgil. "Virgil?" He gets up from the couch. He checks the kitchen, nothing, he checks his room, nothing he checks Virgil room, nothing. He checks Roman room. He greeted by Roman holding a still asleep Nico.

 

"Logan?" Roman asked. 

 

"Have you seen Virgil?" Logan asked getting a little worry.

 

'I sent him to bed, I haven't left my room. Why is something wrong?" 

 

"I don't know, I can't find him. I'm going to check Patton room."

 

"Do you want me to come with you?" 

 

"No, it will be fine. Stay with Nico I would hate for him to wake up and you not be there." Roman nods.

 

"I'll be back in 5 minutes." Logan closes the door and head to Patton room. He opens the door. There’s no one there except for Patton on the bed. He touches the sheets next to Patton and they’re warm. He couldn’t have missed them by more than a few minutes. He continues searching until he spots a scrap of fabric in the corner. He grabs it and sniffs it, immediately recoiling. He looks it over and sees smudges of eyeshadow on it.

 

Logan eyes widen he runs back to Roman room. He slams the door open Roman jumps. "Roman I can't find Virgil and Nemo is missing too."

 

Nico lets out a cry at the jostle. “Ro...”

 

"Sorry love, Logan slow down what do you mean there gone?" 

 

"I check every room in the house. The only thing I could find was this cloth with Virgil eyeshadow on it in Patton room. Nemo wasn't in there either but the spot where he lay in bed with Patton is still warm meaning it hasn't been that long since he left."

 

Nico groggily opens his eyes. “Gone?” He whispers.

 

"shh go back to sleep" Roman rub his shoulder. "Logan, I don't know where they can be." 

 

Logan frustrating groans " I'm aware, that's why we need to find them!"

 

“Rooooooommmm...” Nico mumbles.

 

"What?" Logan said move closer to Nico. 

 

"Nico-" Logan interrupt Roman.

 

"Roman shut up, which room?"

 

“M-Mine.” Nico manages.

 

Logan ran out of the room he hears Roman call out to him, but he ignores him. He opens Nico door standing on the outside of it.

 

Shadows crawl out to greet him. He steps through, ignoring them. He hears crying and turns to see Virgil against the wall, knees draw to his chest, eye shadow blurred, breathing in gasps. There’s a cloth tied through his mouth and around his head to muffle him."Virgil!" Logan runs to him pulling away the cloth. "Come on we need to get out of here."

 

Virgil looks up, eyes wide and full of fear. “Run.” He whispers, looking behind Logan.

 

Logan doesn't have time to react before the shadows wrap around his throat and pull him down. He feels like he is falling, falling down. It's dark he can't see anything. Voices scream at him.

 

_‘He ran away because of you’_

 

_'You couldn't save him'_

 

_‘You fail your family’_

 

_‘You fail’_

 

_‘You fail’_

 

_‘Fail, fail, fail, FAIL, **FAIL** ’_

 

Logan shakes his head. "No, no, no, no"

 

Virgil’s just sitting there, back against the wall, tears falling from his face as he barely notices his boyfriend’s suffering. He glances up and sees a pair of red eyes with one snake pupil and one human pupil watching them with a hint of amusement. He grabs Logan’s throat and turns him over to look up at him.

 

Logan screams for someone to help him. He sees Virgil, he cries to him. "Help me Logan" he reaches for him but the second he touches him he blinks, and Virgil is dead. 

 

"No..." Logan turns his head only to Patton dead, he turns again Roman dead, turns again, Nico, turns again Nemo. There all dead.

 

_‘All your **fault** ’_

 

For once in Logan life he screams he screams at the top of his lungs. "STOP PLEASE GOD MAKE IT STOP!" he cries, Logan Logic Sanders cries. He falls deeper and deeper.

 

Nemo smirks down at the logical side as he cracks. He lets go of the other’s throat and moves away, back into the shadows.

 

Logan continues to fall no matter how much he screams for them to stop it doesn't. 

 

_"What do you know about love? aren't you failing at your job as logic?"_

 

"No, no, I can be good. I can't fail, please I'll do better." Logan plead. "I can be stone cold logic"

 

...

 

It had been 10 minutes. Logan is never late. Roman was getting worry. He looked at the sleeping side. He doesn't want to leave him, but he is worry about the others.

 

Nico groans, and shifts. He hisses as the scabs are rubbed. He senses something is off. He slowly opens his eyes. “Ro?”

 

"Yes dear?" He tries to stay calm despite his worry.

 

“Lo... gan...” Nico breathes deeply through pain. “Find... him... help...”

 

"I can't leave you by yourself. You need me" Roman didn't want to leave him alone, what if it was a trap to leave Nico defenseless?

 

Nico shakes his head. “I’ll... be fine... help... Logan...”

 

Roman frowns but he knows he needs to help Logan. He kisses Nico and gets out of bed. "Stay here, I'll be back." He leaves his room, he locks it and makes it so only he can enter. The one true Roman just in case. He makes his way to Nico room. He pulls out his katana and slowly opens the door.

 

Nemo looks up as light from the hall enters the room. He backs further into the shadows, concealing himself completely. 

 

The shadows reach up for Roman, wrapping around his arms. Roman struggles against the shadow, whispers filling his ears. "SAHLO FOLINA!" Roman yells. The shadow falls off him and goes back into the room. Roman gets a better view of it now. He sees Virgil. He runs in picking him up and moving back towards the door.

 

Nemo hisses at the phrase and hides more, red in his eyes flickering. The shadows rush out and grip Virgil’s legs, Virgil not fighting them.

 

Roman continues to try to pull Virgil out but the shadow gives him resistance. "VIRGIL SNAP OUT OF IT! SAHLO FOLINA, REMEMBER?" Roman doesn't know how many times that phrase was going to work, but he was going to keep trying.

 

The shadows retreat once more, letting Virgil’s leg go. A spark of hope ignites in Virgil’s eyes as he looks up at Roman. Nemo growls and steps forward, drawing his sword. 

Virgil’s face drops. “Roman!”

 

Roman throws Virgil out of the door pulling out his sword ready for battle. "Leave my family alone" He growls.

 

Nemo laughs darkly. "And who are you to protect them? You're nothing! A sorry excuse for a prince! Hardly worthy of being a trophy!" he spins his blade, the tassel moving and distracting Roman as Nemo makes a quick swipe, grazing Roman's arm.

 

Roman is not amused by his comment. He swings his sword clashing into his. "Where is Logan?" He demands.

 

Nemo chuckles. "Safe. For now."

 

He glares at him. "I don't believe you. Where. Is. Logan?"

 

Nemo smirks. "Find him." he runs through a doorway, shadows spilling out of it and engulfing it, making it impossible to see what's on the other side.

 

Virgil groans and slowly gets up in the hallway. He looks up and into the room. "Where are they?"

 

Roman turns towards Virgil. "Stay out, I'm going to go find them." Roman runs into the doorway ready for the worst. 

 

...

 

Logan is surrounded by his dead family, he repeats "I've fail them." over and over again. He finished crying, his eyes hurt. He tries to get up. He needs to get out of where ever he is. A shadow holds onto him. 

 

_'Why leave? They don't need you. Why would they need a failure?'_

 

Logan sighs letting the shadows pull him in deeper and deeper into the ground. It doesn't matter if he escapes, he not need, he useless.


	12. Rescue Me

Shadows surround Roman, their density making it impossible for him to see his own hand in front of his face, much less his sword. He keeps looking around. He suddenly trips and falls, rolling down a concrete staircase.

 

Roman groans, he sits up pain shooting all over his body. His head pounding. "Where am I?" He hears dark laughter echoing of the walls."SHOW YOURSELF FIEND!" Roman screams griping his sword.

 

There’s a red flash of a cloak before it disappears back into the shadows. “Come if you dare...”

 

Roman goes after it keeping his eyes peeled for a sneak attack,but nothing happens. He keeps walking. And walking. And walking. The shadows aren’t as thick anymore, but it’s still dark."FACE ME COWARD" He doesn't have time for this he needs to find Logan.

 

A laugh sounds through the room as a body is thrown at Roman. He ducks then brings his sword up, approaching it. His breath catches and his sword falls to the ground when he sees the unmistakable red-stained, blue tie.

 

"No" Roman kneels to the ground getting a closer look at Logan. His fingers and knuckles are bruised and bleeding. There’s a thin line of blood from his lip, and contusions on the side of his head. His eyes are closed. He looks so frail. So, broken... That’s when Roman notices. He’s not breathing. Logan’s not breathing! He checks his pulse, but he’s just met with cold skin, no drum beating to the march of life behind it. Roman is filled with rage. "I'm going to kill you." He stands up more determined to finish this once and for all. "I"M GOING TO KILL YOU!" He had failed Logan, but he won't fail anyone else. He. Will. Pay.

 

Nemo chuckles and appears in front of Roman. “Be my guest.” He says, bowing. “I despise this one anyways.” He says with a glint of his red eyes. 

 

Nico quickly makes his way through the rooms. Being the embodiment of insecurity, the shadows aren’t as much of a hinderance for him, though they’re still there.

 

Roman raises his sword and strikes him though his side stomach. He grabs onto his neck and pulls him close looking at his red eyes. "I'm not a murderer, I'm Sahlo Folina."

 

Nemo screams and twists in Roman’s hold, red leaving his eyes. He looks at Roman scared and in pain.

 

Roman relaxes letting go of his neck. “This is going to hurt.” He pulls his sword out closing his eyes as Nemo screams in pain. Roman lowers him to the ground. He summons a kit and starts wrapping his wound. “Sorry, it had to be done.”

 

Nemo breathes heavily and nods, flinching as Roman touches him. 

 

Nico runs into the room and sees Logan and Nemo on the ground with Roman over Nemo. “Roman!” He says, rushing towards him. He glances at Logan and sees him dead. He looks at Roman eyes full of fear. 

 

“Not- him.” Nemo gasps out, waving his hand as Logan’s body disappears.

 

Roman sighs in relief then looks back at Nemo. "Where is Logan?"

 

Nico helps Roman work on Nemo. “Don’t... know...”

 

Roman face went white. He looks at Nico. "Is there a way for you to find him?"

…

 

Logan has given up. He tired, he useless and a failure. No one is coming for him. Why should they? He couldn't save Patton, he couldn't save Virgil. He can't help Nemo or Nico. He just lays here listening to his failures over and over again. He failed at everything, even his job. A biased logic with feelings. Patton talk him into accepting his feeling and look at where that got him. Lost in darkness unable to do anything. He falls deeper...

 

…

 

Nico thinks for a moment. “Maybe.” He closes his eyes and tries to focus on Logan’s insecurities. He soon finds him, surrounded in darkness, lies, insecurities, shadows. He’s falling, falling, falling. Nico shakes his head. “He’s up ahead. Get Nemo back to the mindscape.”

"Are you sure? I can come with you?" Roman ask worry about him being left alone.

 

Nico hesitates. He’s not sure how bad things are going to get. “Okay.” He agrees. “I’ll stay here and wait for you.”

 

Roman smiles "I'll be back. Come on snake boy. Will it make you feel better to be with Patton?"

 

Nemo manages a hiss. “You... stabbed me.” He says with a smirk and laughs. “Ya... I... want Patton...”

 

"I said sorry" and he sink out into Patton room, he still asleep. Roman lays Nemo down next to him. "Can I get you anything?"

 

Nemo shakes his head. “No. I’m okay. Go find Logan. I remember it had me take him and shackle him...” he says worriedly.

 

"I'm sure he fine. We'll bring him back." Roman sinks out and stands we're he was before he left. He looks at Nico. "Alright let's get this show on the road."

 

Nico nods and starts walking. The walls narrow in on them, forcing them to walk single file. Nico lets his hand slide along it as he walks, feeling for any variation. His heart beats faster as they get closer and closer to the center of the darkness’s attention. He finds a dip in the wall and puts pressure on it. It slides open to a corridor.

 

Roman holds his hand. "How are you feeling? Physically and mentally."

 

“Physically I feel like crap. Mentally I’m probably close to falling off a cliff, but Logan saved me and I have to save him.” He says with a pained sigh. “I’ll be alright. I just wish this would stop.”

 

"How much farther?"

 

“I can’t tell, but we’re getting close.” Nico says, eyes narrowing. He’s focused on following the trail, but not getting caught up in Logan’s insecurities. They keep walking until there’s another turn, leading into a dungeon. They walk past the empty cells, Nico’s gaze focused ahead.

 

…

Logan sits crisscrossed on the floor. Virgil is in front of him. "your worthless"

 

"I know"

 

"I hate you"

 

"I know"

 

"you couldn't save me"

 

"I know"

 

"You couldn’t save Patton"

 

"I know"

 

 _'How long was Virgil going to tell me things I already know? I'm a failure I get it. Just leave me alone already.'_ Logan thinks.

 

…

 

He turns and looks in a cell. “All my friends are heathens, take it slow.” He whispers, eyes flickering red a moment. He shakes his head and keeps moving. They come to the cell on the end and hear mumbling. They look in and see Logan sitting on the ground, bound in shackles with a distant expression on his face.

 

"Logan!" Roman runs up to the cell he tries to open it but it's lock. "Logan can you hear me?"

 

Logan doesn't move repeating "failure" over and over again in whispers.

 

“Sahlo Folina.” Nico says. The shadows retreat but the cell doesn’t open, and Logan is still in his trance.

 

"Logan" Roman shakes the cell door "Logan snap out of it."

 

Logan doesn't react now switching to "Worthless"

 

Nico leans his head against the bars. “Sahlo folina. Sahlo folina. Sahlo folina.” Logan is lost now... even though the shadows have ceased their assault, they have pushed him into a pit of despair that he can’t get himself out of. And being this close to him is affecting Nico. He can hear all of Logan’s insecurities and starts believing them as his own. He grasps the bars as he slides down, leaning against the iron. “Worthless...” He whispers.

 

Roman knees down to him. "Look at me" He grabs onto his face forcing him to look. "I'm not losing you too. Sink out, I'll think of something."

 

Nico breathes deeply and shakes his head. “If I leave it’ll take you too. I’m staying.”

 

"Then work fast I don't know how much more either of you can take." He looks at Logan. "If I can just get into this blasted cell I can pick him up and take him to my room"

 

Silent tears fall down Logan face. "Die"

 

Nico gasps and clutches his chest, trying to fight the urge to cry. “You don’t deserve to die.” He whispers. “You have done nothing to deserve death.”

 

"Nico-"

 

"I failed" Logan answers still in his trance. Roman eyes widen.

 

'Nico keep talking. I think you can reach him."

 

Nico looks at Logan, tears in his eyes. “Everyone fails. Failure is part of life. What you do with those failures is what matters.”

 

Logan puffs, tears falling fast. "I don't want to fail anymore. I couldn't save them. I wasn't good enough."

 

"Oh Lo..." Roman looks at him with pity. He has never seen Logan cry before. It breaks his heart.

 

Nico scoots as close as he can, reaching through the bars but his fingers just barely miss Logan’s sleeve. He sighs. “Logan. We’re right here. You didn’t fail anyone. You  _are_  good enough. You’re more than enough. You are  _loved_.”

 

"Patton..."

 

“Is alive, he’s alive because of you. You saved him. He loves you, you saved him.”

 

"Logan please we care about you. Virgil safe too, because you went looking for him. Come back to us." Roman plead.

 

Logan blink there a clicking sound. Logan looks up. "Ro..."

 

Nico gets up and throws the now unlocked cell door open and rushes to Logan, pulling him into a hug. “We love you. We love you. We love you.” He says, sobbing. “Stay alive. Stay alive, for me.” He sings through sobs. “You will die, but for now your life is free. Take. Pride. In what is sure. To. Die.” He holds Logan close.

 

Logan hugs him back. "I'm not worthless, I'm not worthless." Roman comes in putting a hand on both of their shoulders. 

 

"Let's get out of here." Roman sinks them out into the commons.


	13. Therapy Session

Nico continues to hold Logan and sob. “You’re not worthless. You’re not a failure. You’re not gone. Oh, Logan, you’re not gone.” He says, burying his face into the other’s shoulder.

 

"I'm sorry I should have been stronger." Logan sob, he wants Virgil, but he also worries that Virgil going to hate him. It's all he heard for what felt like hours. 'I hate you' in Virgil voice.

 

Virgil senses the others presence enter the mindscape and rushes downstairs. “LOGAN!” He screams and rushes towards him, bringing him and Nico down and hugging them. “You’re okay! You’re okay! You’re okay!” He cries.

 

Logan feels Virgil around him. "Please don't hate me..."

 

“Oh, Lo Lo. Shh... I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. I love you so much. You are so strong. I love you. But it’s okay to be weak, you don’t have to be strong all the time. Damn I love you so much, just don’t ever think I hate you. I never hate you. I love you so, so, so much.” Virgil says rapidly, not planning on letting him go anytime soon.

 

Logan holds on to Virgil for dear life and he never wants to let go. "It was so dark, you kept telling me you hated me over and over again. I couldn't save you." Logan couldn't stop crying he felt so weak. He just wanted to curl up and sleep and never wake up. He misses Virgil, he was warm, he was safe. He never wants to leave him again.

 

“Shh... it’s okay, love. You’re home now. You’re safe. It’s over. All that crap is over.” Virgil says.

 

Nico can’t stop crying, burying his face between them and takes away Logan’s insecurities, taking them upon himself. He’s gonna need help after this, but he doesn’t care. All he cares about is Logan.

 

Logan starts to feel better, actually he knows this type of feeling. It's the time of feeling that he got when he would switch emotions with Patton. He shakes his head, he still holds onto Virgil, but he turns his head to better face Nico. "Nico stop, don't do that."

 

“Do what? I’m not doing anything!” Nico says through tears. 

 

“Lo, you’re probably imagining things. Nico’s not doing anything. Come on, lets cuddle on the couch.” Virgil says.

 

Logan shakes his head. "Nico you're doing what Patton does. Taking the fast way out of a problem by putting the problem onto yourself. Don't take my insecurities onto yourself. It helps no one, I should work through them not let someone else deal with them."

 

Nico grips Logan’s shoulder. “Either way, you can’t work through them by yourself. You  _need_  us to help you.”

 

"I know, Roman can we go to your room? I think I could use the confidence right now."

 

"Of course, I had the same idea, but you'll have to get off the floor first."

 

Virgil looks up sheepishly from where he’s pinning Logan and Nico down. “Sorry.” He says with a smile and getting up and offering each of them a hand.

 

Nico sighs as it’s immediately easier to breathe. Not that he minded being in the pile. He takes Virgil’s hand and the other pulls him up.

 

Logan takes his hand letting him pull him up. He doesn't let go of his hand not wanting to lose the touch of his boyfriend. "Alright let’s go" Logan starts walk towards the stairs the others following behind.

 

"I'll meet you there, I'm going to go tell Nemo that you are safe." Roman said moving ahead of the others to Patton room.

 

“Okay.” Nico says, walking on Logan’s left while Virgil is on his right.

 

Roman opens the door slowly peaking in to see if Nemo was even awake.

 

Nemo’s still awake, trying to fight off the lies that come after being possessed by ‘it’. It takes a good day or so to recover, usually. He looks up when the door opens, tensing and readying himself to protect the sleeping side next to him. He sees Roman and sighs. “Did you find him?” He asks, slightly scared of the answer.

 

"Yes, he alright a little upset but ok. We are about to talk about his insecurities in my room. You want to join? My room does tend to make people feel better about themselves."

 

Nemo thinks for a moment and glances down at Patton. He looks around the room then looks at Roman scared. “I don’t want to leave him alone...” he whispers.

 

"I understand, I know how that feels. I'll leave him in your care." Roman says as he closes his door and makes his way to his room.

 

Nico and Virgil are sitting on opposite sides of Logan on the bed. Nico gave Logan a notebook and told him to write down everything he’s insecure about.

 

Logan starts writing it all down: Patton ran away because of me, I fail my family, I'm worthless, what do I know about love? Am I failing at your job as logic? Couldn't save Virgil, can't help Nemo and Nico, "I hate you" in Virgil voice.

 

Logan looks over the list to see if he got it all then hangs it to Nico.

 

Nico reads through the list and wraps an arm around Logan. “How do you feel about these right now?” He asks gently.

 

Logan looks back over the list. "Some make more sense than others. For example, its foolish to believe that Virgil hates me, but you can't deny that me yelling at Patton is what cause him to run away and throw him into his coma."

 

Roman walks into the room. "Alright I have told Nemo that you are ok. Where are we at here?"

 

“I asked Logan to write some things down for us to work through.” Nico says to Roman before turning back to Logan. “That was only the final push. You were not the total cause of it. He was probably planning on isolating himself before that happened. And you know he was already at that point, that’s why you were trying to get him in his room, things just didn’t go according to plan.”

 

“Cognitive distortions, remember?” Vigil says.

 

Roman sits next to Virgil. "He right, you can't blame yourself for it. Patton did it to himself."

 

Logan sighs "I just wish I could have stop it. If he just told us why he didn't want to go to his room. We could have work things out. I should have push harder." 

 

"Should of, could of, would of, you can't focus on the 'if's" Roman added.

 

"Exactly. And pushing harder would have only drove him further away. You did what you could, and what happens, happens. We'll work through it together." Nico says.

 

"And as for knowing nothing about love, from the way you've been treating me I'd say you know more than  _some_  people." Virgil says with a small blush.

 

Logan gives him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks, but-"

 

"Knowing about love and having feelings doesn't make you a bad Logic. We've been over this one. As long as you are able to think of things rationally you are a good Logic. You're doing your job fine." Logan smiles at Roman.

 

'Thank you." He looks back at his list.

 

Nico hands him a pen. "Write down counter arguments to the falsehoods. If you ever feel these thoughts come back up, look at this again. Look at what the thoughts say, then look at what we say."

 

Logan nods he lays his head on Virgil shoulder. "Thank you, thank you all." He relaxes.

 

"Does anyone else have anything to get off their chest? While we are in the mood."

 

Virgil glances at Nico. Nico looks to the floor. "I hate my room." he mumbles.

 

"I can see why, it shouldn't be doing that, but I think it is telling. Our rooms are an extraction of our being, full of our energy. Our rooms change as we do. It can also sometimes show our mental state. For example, Roman room became bland as he was grieving over your death." Logan went into thought.

 

Nico nods. "Ya... I saw it..." he sighs. "I guess I'm just really insecure about who I am. Like... You can tell me all you want who I am, what I am, but you can't tell me everything that makes me, me. I have to find that on my own. But I know a part of who I was, and I don't like it, so I'm afraid to go searching for the rest of me."

 

"Finding yourself is important but I don't see why you have to do it by yourself." Roman move over to be next to Nico and puts a hand on his shoulder.

 

Nico sighs. "Because I don't want anyone to get hurt besides myself. You've seen what I'm capable of. I can't risk the people I love, but you're all so damn loyal I can't disappear for more than 5 minutes before you all start freaking out." he says with a laugh.

 

"Ya. It can seem that way. But either way, people are going to get hurt, so it might as well be while helping you rather than hindering you." Virgil says.

 

"We are all stubborn, its a share trait." Roman says with a laugh.

 

"You don't want us to get hurt and we don't want you to get hurt. We have all try working on our problems by ourselves and you see where that has gotten us." Logan added

 

Nico takes a deep breath and nods. "When I disappeared the other day? And none of you could find me for hours?"

 

"Yeah you scare the crap out of us" Roman said holding him close. "What happened?"

 

Nico monitors breathing. "Same as Logan." is all he says, hoping he won’t have to explain. "Except no one dragged me there. I went there on my own. The shadows, they... They took me by the arm and led me there... I drew a map of the dark side in my journal because I was planning on going there to try and explore myself more and figure out where I fit in when the shadows took me. But... After what happened... I really don't want to go back there."

 

"Ya... Nemo noticed the map. He was very passionate about finding you. I was surprised." Virgil says. "And if you do decide to go back to the dark side, I don't think you'll have to worry about Malice anymore..." he says before he can stop himself. Virgil and Nico hold their breath.

 

Logan looks at them with a confuse expression. "What do you mean? What happened to Malice?"

 

Roman tilted his head. "Uh Logan you..." He stops after seeing the look on Virgil face.

 

Logan looks at Virgil. "You never told me how we got out of the dark side."

 

"You don't remember?" Roman asked

 

"No, I woke up not remembering anything that happen while I was there." Logan answer. He looks back at Virgil. "What are you not telling me?"

 

Virgil looks down and bites his lip. His breathing is shaking. "I... Think you... Killed... Malice..." he says slowly, not looking up, not wanting to see Logan's expression.

 

Nico watches them both carefully. "The dark side corrupted you." he quickly says. "You acted like your dark side counter, Insanity, rather than yourself..."

 

Logan cover his mouth, he was shock. He killed someone. He. Killed. Someone.

 

"Logan stop, it's alright. You had to stop him somehow." Roman tried.

 

"Logan." Nico says sternly, sliding off the bed and kneeling in front of him, holding his face to look at him. "You. Did. Not. Kill. Him. That. Wasn't. You. Do you understand? You had no control over yourself. We don't even know for sure if he's dead." he says, glancing at Virgil who still hasn't looked up yet.

 

"What did I do?"

 

"According to Nemo you bash his head with a hammer." Roman answered.

 

“I did kill him, head shots are dangerous. With enough force you can crush the skull and damage the brain causing in brain damage-" Logan starts talking faster the more he goes on.

 

Nico slaps his hand over Logan's mouth. "Shh. Quiet." he says, looking into the other's eyes.

 

Virgil glances up and his eyes narrow at seeing Nico so close to his boyfriend.

 

Logan shuts up starring at Nico. He's scared, he doesn't know what to do. He killed a man, what can he do about that?

 

Nico slowly removes his hand. "Breathe." he says, inhaling slowly and waiting for Logan to follow.

 

Logan follows, he knows the drill. He does it will Virgil all the time. He goes in for 4, holds for 7 and out for 8. He watches Nico as a guide unable to do it by himself. He manages to calm down. He stays silent.

 

Nico scratches Logan's head calmingly. He doesn't bother trying to convince Logan that everything's okay, or that Malice isn't dead. There's really nothing words can do at the moment. He just sits there and massages Logan's head and shoulders. He tries to ignore Virgil's glares.

 

Logan leans into the touch, he was tired, he was emotionally tired. This was too much emotion for him to handle. He closes his eyes and focuses on Nico fingers kinda wishing it was Virgil.

 

Virgil clenches and unclenches his fists before 'gently' shoving Nico away and holding Logan close. Nico sighs and moves to sit next to Roman.

 

Roman wraps his arms around him. He whispers into his ear "You did great" giving him a kiss on the cheek. 

 

Nico smiles against the kiss. He wishes there was more he could do, but there isn't.

 

Logan hold onto Virgil burying his face into his shoulder. He mumbles "I'm tired"

 

Virgil nods and picks him up and sinks out without saying anything.

 

Nico sighs. "I think I pissed him off."

 

Roman chuckles "He's just protective and a little jealous. I wouldn't think too much about it. You would be jealous too if Virgil was giving me a massage." Roman nuzzled his facing into his neck.

 

Nico smiles and hums against Roman, turning to pull him closer and- "OW! SHIT!" He shoves himself away, clutching his side and squeezing his eyes shut.

 

"What's wrong?" Roman asked looking him up and down for a problem.

 

"S-Scabs." Nico manages, laying down and hissing. "Pain meds... Wearing off..."

 

Roman looks and sees the pills on his night stand. He picks them up and hands them to Nico. "Here"

 

Nico groans and sits up, takes them, then lays down, laughing in pain. "Funny... Adrenaline is the best pain reliever..."

 

Roman laughs "I know that as a fact." He lays down next to Nico. "How about when you feel better we take a trip to the garden. Just the two of us, we can smell the flowers. Maybe we can dance and just relax for a while." He massages his head.

 

Nico purrs and smiles. "I'd like that." he says, looking at Roman dreamily before kissing him slow and softly. "I love you." he whispers. He doesn't care if he says it every hour, he'd say it every minute if he could.

 

"I love you to sunshine and don't you forget it." He boops his nose. He holds him close burying his face into his neck.

 

Nico laughs. "I could never forget, my prince." he runs his hands down Roman's back. "You need a shower." he comments with a smirk.

 

Roman sniffs him "Indeed you do too. Do you need assistance with that?" He smirks at him.

 

Nico quirks a brow at him. "Perhaps..." he says, drawing his fingers down the other's jaw and to his collar before kissing him deep and rough, moaning slightly and letting pain morph into something else...

...

 

Logan rest his head on Virgil. "Thank you."

 

"Ya. No problem." Virgil says, curling around his boyfriend on Logan's bed. He can't stop thinking about everything. It all seems to be moving so fast, and it's not slowing down. A part of him misses his things used to be. Simpler. But wasn't he happier now? He sighs and buries his head under Logan's chin. "I love you, Lo. Nothing will ever change that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We hope that you like the story. Sorry that it got a little too violent. We can't seem to stop so now we are writing part 5. I hope you all like it. We hope you have a great day and happy reading.-Terra


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